I\u2019ve often said, generally in the wee small hours of the morning at some seedy nightspot whilst musing with the other girls (you know those times when you\u2019re sorting out the world\u2019s problems or philosophically discussing whether the universe is a molecule inside a table leg etc) that being Emma is just like being Batman, or Batgirl, but without the Butler, Batmobile, or inclination to fight crime.
\nThere are lots of similarities between The Batman and we ladies. The Batman keeps his true identity secret. He generally only goes out at night. He is motivated by an inner desire he can\u2019t let go of. The Batman has Commissioner Gordon as a confidante, Emma has the Door Bitch at Lotus Lounge and you would have something similar.<\/p>\n
Emma sits at my very core and she is never far away from my ear as I go about my daily grind disguised as \u201cBruce Wayne\u201d. She slows my walk as I wander past clothes and shoe shops, she sends my eyes discretely following what women are wearing out in the street \u201ctut tutting\u201d when she sees things that are clearly unsuitable for the wearer and offering a \u201chmmm\u201d when she sees something that might suit her walking past. She has an opinion on social issues and frames my thinking around them. As a boofy old Australian Rules footballer, Bruce Wayne is surprisingly thought of by all who know him as \u201cquite progressive\u201d in his thinking and a man who \u201cgets\u201d women. The clues are all there for the observant types but no one ever suspects. I shall give you a few examples of both:<\/p>\n
\u2022\tIn Gotham City, who else BUT Bruce Wayne could possibly afford all that stuff The Batman has.<\/p>\n
\u2022\tOccasionally, someone will say to me \u201cHey!? Do you shave your legs? How come you\u2019re doing that you big poof?\u201d I generally reply \u201cI do Masters cycling and you have to get with the program!\u201d This is universally accepted by whichever Neanderthal has asked despite the clear evidence that they have never seen me on a bike or heard anything about me doing Masters cycling EVER. The fastest I ever move is when someone calls \u201clast drinks\u201d.<\/p>\n
\u2022\tDespite The Batman\u2019s close working relationship with the best detective on the GCPD Commissioner Gordon has never worked out who The Batman is. Wouldn\u2019t that be first on his list to work out? Not one of his super-villain adversarys has worked it out either.<\/p>\n
\u2022\tOur local footy club has an ageing dishwasher. I was having a beer there last Thursday night with a group of blokes when one of them noticed a slight tinge of red lipstick on the glass I was using. \u201cHey \u2013 you\u2019ve got lipstick there! Are you one of them crossdresser girlyboy types? Ha ha ha ha ha\u201d (picture loud laughter by all standing around the table). \u201cYes\u201d I said \u201cMost Saturday nights I leave here, throw some clubwear on and a bit of makeup, some killer heels, and head out on the town \u2013 it\u2019s great fun you should try it\u201d. More laughter, then back to discussions on football. It delights me when I lie with the entire truth.<\/p>\n
It would be fabulous to have a Batcave it must be said. A hidden place accessed only by a secret entrance where you could have rows and rows of clothes and shoe racks and a kick arse makeup table. No problems there with the Christadelphians knocking on the front door while you\u2019re trying to get your shapewear sorted or mum just \u201cdropping in\u201d whilst she is passing and you\u2019ve just put your foundation on. In a way though, we all have a Batcave but it is generally a hidden drawer, or a suitcase, or something equally as unremarkable wherein our femme form resides patiently for us to access her. It is no less as wondrous going to these places as when Bruce Wayne pushes a button and the bat-suit is revealed but it is distinctly low tech by necessity. I reckon that Bruce Wayne feels stronger\/faster\/tougher when he has the black lycra on and I know when I\u2019m dressed I feel sexier, flirtier, and often drunker - but that is a separate issue.<\/p>\n
There was really no point to this post other than I saw the quote right at the bottom here quite randomly and it got me thinking. . I shall not bore you with my other superhero analogy about the similarities between the story of Christ and the story of Superman\u2026.wherein a superior being sends his only son to earth\u2026we don\u2019t hear much about either between the time they are young boys and 31 yo\u2026.they both have ordinary jobs\u2026ah, you get the picture.<\/p>\n
\u201cBruce Wayne is just the mask that The Batman wears in public\u201d \u2013 DETECTIVE COMICS #577<\/p>\n","protected":false},"template":"","topic-tag":[],"class_list":["post-2503","topic","type-topic","status-publish","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/tgr.net.au\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/topic\/2503","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/tgr.net.au\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/topic"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/tgr.net.au\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/topic"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/tgr.net.au\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/topic\/2503\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/tgr.net.au\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2503"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"topic-tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tgr.net.au\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/topic-tag?post=2503"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}