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Acceptance by Partners Past and Present
Strange how acceptance by partners can attract different outcomes. I’ve been dressing since my teens off and on but it was only when I reached my mid 20s dressing became more prevalent in my life. To be honest, I doubt that I actually knew why I wanted to explore another side of my inner self back then. However, when I came out to my then wife, her reaction was one of horror. Perhaps because she was raised as a stauch Catholic that remained steadfast to those ideals. Needless to say, dressing, or the desire to explore the sensuality of dressing with her did not take. We did what all young couples did and saw a professional counselling service to try to move forward; however, reminiscing on my inability to articulate myself honestly, I believe not having great conversation skills contributed to my marriage downfall.
I was fortunate to find a woman, who was older than me, who had little inhibitions about discovering sensual pleasure and supporting me, and for that matter herself, on an amazing life’s journey. The greatest of physical and emotional acceptance occurred in that time. The outcome of which was an amazing relationship where we could support and share each other completely.
Of course, all good things come to an end and life’s demands (Work and Opportunities) saw the two of us go our own way.
My current partner, who I’ve been with for 20 plus years, does understand my needs, is supportive but does not extend the same degree of acceptance as my previous partner.
To be honest, I think I’ve been more fortunate than others. I do contemplate what my life may have been without the genuine support of my cherished relationships. But, more than often I wonder if life is easier for those younger than me in this world of greater social acceptance.
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1 Reply
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Hi Bridgett
Thanks for your post . You certainly have been more fortunate than others in terms of varying degrees of acceptance by a partner . I don’t know exactly what it is that makes some more accepting than others and in some cases even to the point of “encouraging”. In my own case I dont consider I experience the latter but my partner is still very supportive and attends various events with me including some that have a large number of males attending eg my golf club presentation nights.
But back to your point, its a very interesting phenomenon that some have partners that are accepting and other’s have difficulty to the extent that the relationship fails . Im not sure if there are any studies on exactly why that is but I’d like to think it’s being thought of. I do agree that people these days younger ones in particular are far more accepting and those people who are called” ALLIES”s ie cis gender people who are supportive of us are to be thanked ; congratulated and appreciated etc etc . They do make a significant contribution to our acceptance by the wider community . I have experienced personally that degree of support on a number of occasions and sometimes by males which is heartening.
I do hope others will enjoy acceptance but it can take time and patience and close communication with your partner.
