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Apparent Bucks suicide points up transgender stres
From Philly.com
By Ben Finley, Inquirer Staff Writer
Posted: August 21, 2014
http://articles.philly.com/2014-08-21/news/53078063_1_transgender-people-michele-angello-suicideQuote:Jessica Moscatel came out as transgender in 11th-grade English class this spring. The teen asked classmates and teachers to call him Riley Matthew Moscatel from then on.They did.
The request met little resistance at Bucks County Technical High School, which has other transgender or openly gay students.
“Everyone supported him,” said a friend, Kate Cimino, who will be a junior this year. “Everyone loved Riley. He was everyone’s best friend.”
But on Monday, the 17-year-old appeared to commit suicide, the county Coroner’s Office said. Police recovered surveillance video that showed the teen stepping in front of an Amtrak train near his home in Bristol Township.
Coroner Joseph Campbell said Wednesday that his office was continuing to investigate the death. Efforts to reach Moscatel’s family were unsuccessful.
His friends and teachers were grasping for answers Wednesday. Friends said he had suffered from depression when he was younger but had improved. However, they said he felt increasingly uncomfortable in his female body.
A note Moscatel appeared to have posted on his Instagram account Monday stated: “My mirror reflects Jessica, my heart and mind say Riley … You see me as the happiest person in school, I’m a prisoner of my own body …”
Moscatel “still really wasn’t a guy physically,” Cimino said. “Even though everyone showed support and called him Riley, it didn’t match up to what he felt of himself.”
Another friend, Carley Foss, said: “He was super-frustrated with his body. And more and more frustrated every single day.”
Foss said Moscatel had been researching hormone treatments, which he hoped to begin after he turned 18 this December. He also wanted to have breast surgery.
Rates of suicide and suicide attempts are much higher among transgender people – as much as 41 percent, according to one survey – compared with the rest of the population, experts say. But it’s a complicated and understudied issue, particularly among youths.
Arnold Grossman, a New York University professor of applied psychology, is studying the issue with funds from the National Institute of Mental Health. He said suicide attempts by transgender youth often stem from feelings of not belonging, burdening family members, and seeing no way out of the situation.
Michele Angello, a psychotherapist based in Wayne, noted the sense of despair that can come from feeling disconnected from one’s body. Other pressures for such young people include a lack of support, being bullied, and having trouble finding a job.
“I have amazingly intelligent and beautiful adolescents coming into my office in total despair because of one of those factors,” she said.
The uncomfortableness for transgender youth can be intense enough to “throw them into crisis,” said Andrew Spiers, co-coordinator of the trans health information project GALAEI, a Latino social justice organization in Philadelphia.
“Anybody that’s transitioning should probably be seeing a therapist,” Spiers said. “For teenagers, given what they’re going through on top of questions about gender identity, that’s a lot to handle.”
Kevin Gentilcore, supervisor of Pupil Personnel Services at the tech school, said Moscatel’s teachers were devastated.
“They said Riley had a great year last year,” he said. “She felt supported by friends and family and that’s why this has shocked everyone.”
He described the school as one that accepts “all of our children for who they are and as they are.”
“With all of our support and the school culture we have, if we have a student who chooses to take their own life, it can happen anywhere,” he said.
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10 Replies
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When; WHEN; Oh when will this EVER bloody well STOP.
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Unfortunately suicide is a fact of life amongst the transgender community, the figure in the original article of 41% would be about the right figure. Personally, I consider such a high rate of suicide a blight on society. I do sometimes wonder if the feelings of derision, alienation, rejection and abandonment stem mainly from within the transgender person own psyche. Now don’t get me wrong I’m not saying the transgender community doesn’t bear the brunt of derision from some segments of the general community, it does.
How can we help prevent such suicides within our own community? that is within our own group. I believe that a continuing process of self acceptance is partially the answer. If you feel good about oneself then what other think or project is of little consequence. Holding the head high with confidence (even if forced) works wonders. It’s not the total answer, if there is such a thing, I don’t know. Suicide is a subject that I have for a long time devoted much time and though to, so far I can only help individuals that I come across, then it’s touch and go.
I would love to come up with the whole answer, but I cannot, the subject is so complicated and involves individual minds which are independent.
I feel immensely sad when I read of suicides, and not just the suicides of transgender people. To feel so intensely sad, and helpless and alienated from the world to too much to bear. -
There is quite a bit of research that does say up to 40% of trans people have attempted suicide at some point in their lives. It’s way too high, any suicide is one too many.
A thing that irks me is the Australian media approach of not reporting on suicide.There have been at least 4 suicides in trans or trans related people in Melbourne in the last 4 months. One was a young person. Without media reporting there is no discussion in the community. This suppression of information (I think the stated reason is that if people read about suicide they might go and do it themselves!) is absurd. We need to be informed on what is happening in our communities otherwise we cant do anything about it. In part to answer the question as to what we can do, I think it starts with honest open conversations about the issue. That trans people are vulnerable and need to be heard. As more information is available throughout our communities, perhaps more people will be supportive of the diversity that touches all of us one way or another.
It’s important that we all keep an eye on each other, just being there to listen to someone could make all the difference.
Gracex -
I think Grace is right in saying that the wider community needs to be more aware and educated about transgender issues and I agree with her frustration with the Australian media in particular. Although we can try to deal with individual problems, case by case, this is just treating the symptoms, without getting to the heart of the matter: a greater feeling of understanding and acceptance from the community at large.
As a matter of interest, I would be interested to know if the suicide rate in the gay community has decreased over the years since gay rights have been acknowledged and acted upon.
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Pure and simple acceptance is the key. It all starts with family and community not crushing the idea of individuals being truly themselves. It’s deeply engraved in the psyche of everyone from an early age that conformity is good and nonconforming behavior is bad.
Unfortunately to some extent it is a necessary evil in a society but it is taken to far , unfortunately it gets in micro management of human behavior by persons with no comprehensive understanding of the potential results. Almost the entire population starts life being directly pushed into gender conformity.
Is there a little light? I think so. There is an interest in the media that has been gaining momentum in the past few years and it is slowly revealing gender diversity and gender diverse role models for all to admire. The secrets of the past are being unveiled and the reality of different types of gender experience are being discussed. The greater the number of positive role models the better off we will all be.
There was a comment on here the other day about an article I posted basically discussing trans politics. The comment basically questioned why should people bother if they haven’t a problem. This is why, exposure of our community requires the involvement of the community . Preferably as people begin to see and ask questions we need a coherent voice or voices to help guide the conversation to a fruitful end. The foundation of the depression we often suffer is laid at an early age , with out obvious role models for children to point out families have little to guide them. They as parents need to know that the best people are the real people and they need to be able to see successful trans people as much as their children do.
When we eventually get there and the foundation of life for gender diverse children is a positive one , then the future may hold fewer tragic stories. We still have a long road ahead of us before it is simply life and not difference thet gets us down!
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I posted this article about Riley, because the circumstances did not seem to point to a lack of public acceptance as the most significant contributory factor.
“Even though everyone showed support and called him Riley….”
“The request met little resistance at Bucks County Technical High School, which has other transgender or openly gay students.”
She felt supported by friends and family and that’s why this has shocked everyone.”This just doesn’t appear to be a case of a transgender running up to a brick wall and deciding to quit out of frustration.
So if Riley wasn’t lacking support and acceptance we have to go to perhaps more uncomfortable territory to understand why she felt life was not worth living. Uncomfortable, because the transgender suicide narrative does have an elephant (or two) hiding in the cupboard – there is much we don’t talk about, probably because we don’t understand. As the article states, “it’s a complicated and understudied issue, particularly among youths”.
I have yet to see any data showing a relationship between suicide, societal acceptance, and the steps taken to reconcile gender identity and physical body. The few suicides I am personally aware were of people who had gone a long way down the reconciliation track but who also found lacked acceptance and support. But maybe this is an atypical experience, because 41% of the transgender people I have met certainly haven’t given in. Maybe the 41% refers not to transgender people, but to individuals who present at a gender clinic seeking SRS? I just don’t know., but everyone else is very much flying under the statistical radar.
The article states that the issues facing transgender youths include a lack of support, being bullied, and having trouble finding a job. Its a familiar story no matter what your age, but Riley at 17 doesn’t seem to fit this pattern.
So I am left with a big question.
How could Riley’s life have been different so that the burden of being transgender became less overpowering?
It is possibly an uncomfortable question, made difficult by the sketchy details we have of her life. But the answer might challenge some of the assumptions we all share. -
The critics in your own mind are often much worse than those on the street.
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Laura_J wrote:The critics in your own mind are often much worse than those on the street.
Truer words have never been spoken.
And this is where the disgusting misnomer of “passing” stems from. Once you dig deep enough within yourself to find total acceptance without shame, guilt or blame; what else or who else matters.
Dig deep
Huggs
Catherine -
This is an interesting discussion which challenges us to think a bit harder. Unfortunately, we can only speculate as to why this tragedy happened. The fact is we will never know. Self-acceptance is, as others have suggested, ultimately up to oneself, but you can have 99 supporters and it only takes one detractor to destroy your feelings of self-worth possibly with serious consequences. It’s a mine field, and you only have to tread on one……
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Suicide, depression, lack of self worth (self esteem), constant fear of ridicule, fear of what other would think should they find out. There’s something wrong with me but I don’t know what to do about it, where and can I get help without being criticized. Why can’t I be myself without all this hullabaloo about being transgender? Who can I talk to about it, my parents wouldn’t understand. All this is making me depressed and physically ill inside; the pain is unbearable. How can I stop the pain; there’s only one way to stop the pain.
Does this all sound familiar? It does to me, a lifetime of familiarity, from childhood to teenage years and so on to adulthood. This is what suicide is all about, ending the unbearable pain.When I read of yet another suicide, a little more of me dies inside. I’ve tried to think of some of tactics we could use to relieve some of the pain and ridicule associated with being transgender. Fro an example, I wrote the other day of brightening my neighbours eyes, sounded somewhat funny, yes, but there is another side to the tale. The stress it imposes on me, can I hold my head high as a result of that encounter? I’m not totally sure.
Education. Education and continuing support of the trans individual. Education of the general public to eradicate the general misconceptions around transgenderism.It’s only a lifestyle choice, give it up.
They must be gay.
Their mother wanted a girl (or boy) so much its affected the personality.
They’ll never be a real woman (or man).
It’s an illusion, and so on, I’m sure others could think of many more.
They live in a fantasy world.We are all different, there are those individuals who apparently find it so easy to go public in a dress etc. There are those who find being very open en-femme difficult. It all adds to the constant and mounting strain imposed on the individual which could, accumulate resulting into suicidal thoughts and deeds.
Self acceptance is a wonderful concept, but to some it is just a concept, but never reality. I still struggle with the shame and guilt of being different. Suicide, yes, I’ve been down that road in thoughts and deeds. And after 77 years I still ask WHY?
