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As a Transexual what quality of life do you have?
Strange question you may think, but I have a reason for this. Many of you have expressed your fears about health and family problems whilst struggling with coming out and then transition and HRT, but in reality all of the girls here have a dream life compared to the Transsexuals I have known over the last 18 years.
I was reminded of the TS’s I knew a few weeks ago when driving into an Industrial area at Eastern Creek in the truck. There was a girl on the side of the road talking to someone in a car, and as she stood back to open the car door I realised that she was in fact someone I had come in contact with some years earlier. I have seen her since, on the same corner, many times, getting into or out of cars.
Until getting involved with TgR I would not have given her a second thought, but now I realise that there is a vast spectrum of Transsexuals within the spectrum of humanity. The girls involved with TgR are reasonably affluent, have some sort of education (know how to use a computer at the very least
) and on the whole have a reasonable life, careers, jobs, family etc. But the girls I knew before coming here were entirely different.You see I worked as a Prison Officer for 15 years in a NSW prison. Many Transsexuals come to the male prisons as a matter of choice. They can elect to go to a womens gaol if they desire but most don’t, I think they get treated badly by the female inmates. The thing is they are a whole different community to the girls at Tranny Radio, their life choice has bought them a lot of pain in some instances and many turned to drugs to hide from the world. The drugs of course took over and they lost the respect of friends, family and employers, and eventually found themselves on the streets, shoplifting for food and clothes and committing crimes to pay for their drug habits. Habits I might add that had gone way beyond their financial means. Selling their bodies was only a short step away from this, because disappointingly they are in an ever increasing downward spiral. Life becomes unbearable for many of them, I know of one inmate Transsexual who successfully committed suicide on the second attempt, while being treated for the first. She jumped out of the window of her hospital room. One of the guards hung on to her as long as he could but she struggled too much and he lost his grip. They were on the 6th floor, and I think she will be in their memories for quite some time. I will always remember her, she was tall thin and only had a few wisps of hair left that she combed over her bald head, the first time she came to gaol. She was very shy and I believe a little disturbed mentally. The second time she came in she had a wig that had been matted into three or four thick strands, but she wore it around the gaol with the little makeup the system allowed her to have. Needless to say the other inmates used her and ridiculed her, but occasionally someone would look after her for a while, but relationships in gaol don’t last long. She was later transferred and died in Sydney.
There were some who loved life though, probably the ones who still had hopes for the future and hadn’t been dragged down to rock bottom by the drugs yet. I remember one girl who had a few short sentences for shoplifting, the first one at David Jones the last one at Target, I remember asking what had gone wrong with her taste, She said the security guards all knew her at David Jones.
Anyway I wasn’t sure if many of you were aware of these girls and their unfortunate lives but perhaps you have more to be thankful for than these unfortunate girls at least.
How is your life, tell me some good stories.
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6 Replies
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So far my life has definatly been better since transitioning and since I have had surgery I feel as one with myself, see my blog or visit my facebook page, link is on my profile, for more information, but I am happier, a lot more confident, I go out more, I don’t do drugs or smoke, I have the odd drink, I also have a lot more friends now than I did before, quite a few of them I went to school with, the only downer is that to mum I am persona non-grata, and so far she is the only one that really has a problem with my life as I am living it now.
Hugs
Sharon -
Since letting my natural juices flow and progrssing from a crossdresser to someone who has started transition and HRT, I’ve never been happier Pamela. I do have a heap of worry, don’t get me wrong, at the moment I’m sorting out an ex. that is bankrupt and working hard to keep my house and so on. Those issues are just normal life, male or female, it doesn’t matter. Getting involved with drugs and all that rubbish hasn’t even crossed my mind, I believe that that is because of my upbringing which was good.
No matter how far anyone goes in their journey in life, whatever it is, you will never do it unless you have been taught/brought up with good values and education. Willpower is another issue, if you really want it, then you will get it.
Living as a female, I have never been happier, never ever. Even my thought processes are a lot clearer. I really do wish that I was born one.
Peta A.
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Totally Agree Peta, this was the same for me, Mum and dad bought my sister and I up to be good, honest and to be independent, which is one of the reasons my sister, other relation’s, family friends and myself can not fully understand why mum is so fully against my life choices, and a lot of them are to frightened to say any thing to her, for if they do she goes off her head at them, one good example of this is when one of the long time family friends siad to mum, “doesn’t Sharon look happier now”, my mum started yelling at the top of her voice saying things like “I do not know that person and never mention it again”, the friend was so scared by the outburst she ended up getting away as fast as possible, and now she is very guarded when around mum, how ever as my friends say this is my mums problem and not mine, and live my life for myself, which is what I am doing.
Quote:No matter how far anyone goes in their journey in life, whatever it is, you will never do it unless you have been taught/brought up with good values and education. Willpower is another issue, if you really want it, then you will get it.Living as a female, I have never been happier, never ever. Even my thought processes are a lot clearer. I really do wish that I was born one
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Hi All
I think for me it was what sort of life did I have before I cameout and became fulltime. My relationships did not last even when I was upfront with my dressing. They all started out thinking it was great as the had their BF & GF all in the same person, but then they would leave me for a real man as they found that I was not what they wanted.
I would spend most of my spare time at home dressed with the doors and windows shut. It was the only place I felt I could be me. The only time I did feel real was when I left town for the Gold Coast as female.
Now I can live my life almost like a normal girl. Relationships are a little harder as it will take time for the town to get use to me, they are supportive but dont like me to date there bro/sister/friend but that will change with time. Where I am living now they all think I am just another girl.
My relationship with my parents has never been better, it did have a rocky patch when I first cameout, but I can talk to my dad more than I have ever been able to ever. Even on the phone it use to be 1 min max, now I can spend 40 + mins just chatting. Much the same with mum.
So for a few small things, my life is about normal and very livable now.
xxx
Kelly Jones
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I couldn’t be better now. I’ve recently moved to Malta (as some here know), and whilst the island is 98% Catholic (strict) and therefore you would expect unsupportive, my experience has been totally the reverse.
Everyone loves me for who I am, some know I am TS, some do not, and they all accept me for who I am regardless of that knowledge. I don’t get any stares, I get lots of wolf-whistles when dressed in a way to garner them.
I am loving life finally!
Shells
xx(Those on my facebook “friends list” can see some of the latest piccies, sorry for those that are not, but my life is no longer visible to friends of my ex – perhaps that’ll change when she stops getting her boyfriends from phoning me and messaging me at all times of the day and night to gloat that they are dating her!)
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Hi everyone….
Like my friend ‘Shells’ said, “life could’nt be better “ ( well, I guess it could if I found the right person…lol !) My life is basically the same as any other womans. I am making lots of new friends…..everyone is so sweet whereever I go.
I am working in my boy’s school tuckshop (which is also my old school) and the ladies are fantastic. Got invited to the Melbourne Cup Ladies luncheon and also the Tuckshop Christmas Luncheon.
I also take my boy ( only 9 yrs. old. ) to Karate twice a week and we have both made lots of new friends. The ladies chat to me about men and menopause ! lol.I do have lots of funny experiences though….. I was at a shop recently and this sweet little Pacific Islander girl said to me “Excuse me for asking… but are you pregnant?” (Thank you, Yes…..I know I have heaps of weight to loose !!! )
I didnt know weather to laugh or cry….I chose to laugh !
The only looks I get seem to be from a few younger girls who must think I am too old to be pregnant !
Went to the local shopping centre recently and there were these Indian guys outside in the carpark selling two bottles of dry car-wash for only $50 ….Gee, what a bargain !!!
I told this guy in his thirty’s that I was just a carer for my elderly Mum and also for my son. And so he says to me “So where is your husband?”
Thinking quickly I said “in Melbourne”…(well, thats half-true anyway ! lol )
And so he proceeded to follow me to my car and gave me his phone number !
I’m gay, so if I want Indian, I’ll go make myself a nice hot Vindaloo !
Cheers & Hugs…Monique
