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Does gender realy exist?
I have recently been exploring what the general public understands by gender. My search took me to an article that posed a pretty fundamental and challenging question. Particularly to someone like me who considers themselves to be gender diverse.
The anonymous author of the blog article asks the question, “does gender exist?”.
http://yourfeministfriend.wordpress.com/2013/02/06/does-gender-exist/
I’ll include an extract of the blog article here to stimulate discussion.
Quote:Growing up, we are taught that there are girls and boys, male/female, man/woman. Boys have penises, short hair and like the color blue and girls have vaginas, long hair and like the color pink. Before we are even born our favorite colors, toys and other interests are chosen for us based on our genitalia.
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Here is the interesting part: What is deemed “masculine” and “feminine” has changed drastically throughout history, and is different depending on the culture. Men used to wear dresses and high heels. In some cultures such as the berdaches, an Indigenous North American people, there are “two-spirit” people. These people take on a mixture of both stereotypical male and female roles and characteristics, and it is 100% the norm.Most people think “penis” when they think of the word “male” and “vagina” when they think of “female.” However, sex and gender are not the same thing. Your gender identity is how you identify yourself based on cultural definitions of gender, and your sex is biological. In other words, you can be biologically male, but feel as though you are stereotypically female, and still be attracted to females. The plethora of different gender identities is totally gnarly and fascinating.
So then, it is safe to say that gender roles are made up, and the proof is in how they have and continue to differ drastically throughout history and cultures.
If gender is made up, then does it really exist?
It exists in the way that we, as humans, have created it, therefore it did not exist before we made these silly rules. Is there, then, no solid base for what constitutes stereotypical maleness and femaleness?
So while you may FEEL that you are “female” in spirit, yet you’re “male” physically (or vice versa), it’s all based on something with no solid base. This begs the question: Does gender REALLY exist?
Ok – over to you!
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12 Replies
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I believe that gender exists, but only in the mind. It is part of how we define ourselves as individuals. The really interesting part is that our brains are wired in a certain way and that seems to be pre-determined. We are born with the wiring largely in place, but social and cultural conditioning often drives us to adopt certain behaviour patterns that are considered “normal” for our physical sex. That was certainly the case with me and it took me nearly 50 years to figure out what was “different” about me and why I did not identify with several aspects of “normal” male behaviour. The end consequence is that I am a much happier person accepting who I am: a person whose gender is neither male nor female, but both.
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Now this is an even more sticky one AA !! Other creatures seem to have a definite difference in the ‘nature” between male and female, hormones ensure that but the differences are a gross estimate of behaviour. Some male dogs are passive and nurturing and some females are aggressive and challenging for example. I believe that Jane Goodall recorded true transsexual behaviour in chimps where a male was accepted by the others as female and behaved accordingly.
I think that we have to look to behaviour to determine if gender is real but that is so culturally dependent that the two cannot be separated I think. There are too many factors in play to make a determination of what gender is but if pushed to an answer as to whether it exists, I would have to say yes.
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Yes. I’m in no doubt as to the model or template that permeates all creatures.
The first time I became aware of ‘gender’ based behaviour was ‘female’ behaviour in a sheepdog towards her male owner, the distinct difference in my (male) dog towards me and how both demonstrated their respective relationship. Still fascinated by viva la difference…
How? Physical divergence in the brain’s hard-wiring, caused mainly by XX or XY.- Basic Biology. Then there are individual variations as has been mentioned.But overlaying all, in my view, is hormones. In my own body T-suppressed and Estrogen-flooded, what I think and feel… Dormant emotions appearing, preferences emerging and subtle behaviours altering. Not only , but more telling is my acceptance of these as… well… just normal.
All of them are not my previously masculine normal. -They’re classic ‘female’ traits.
Like growing and shaping my fingernails in a female style. – 3 of them are false, longer than I’ve ever had my own… and they feel wonderful on a keyboard ! Good back-scratchers too.
Even amongst my gay friends, I’ve discerned different roles that each gravitates to. Blurred, sometimes fluid but they fit the M/F roles.In summary, Yes. The different ‘genders’ are halves of a whole, so when the opposites are perfectly united (mind, heart and body) they form a perfect coupled “One”.
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Of course it does. Why else would we Girls want to change ??? – and I’m not talking about the plumbing.
In my own journey, unique as it is – I notice and rejoice in the subtle changes in how and what I think and feel. mainly Feel… Such as tearing up and feeling warm and protective, happy-sad, at certain parts in films. – Even in the latest Dr Who. My hormone levels don’t need to be tested…. just watching a movie or reading about emotional subjects affects me.
And I love it, so different from my (overly) rigid, male-viewpoint and little empathy that my Wife sometimes was annoyed over.I don’t classify these reactions into ‘male’ or ‘female’ any more, they’re so much a part of the ‘normal’ me and it all feels so comfortable and natural. Even my breasts – growing nicely, thank you for asking! – are no longer a novelty, simply an aspect or background of “Jeanette”
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Jeanette wrote:Of course it does. Why else would we Girls want to change ???Perhaps because we don’t change our gender.
I don’t think my gender has changed since I was a child.
All that has happened is that I’ve become more aware/understanding of it over the years.
Over time I’ve changed my presentation to be closer to my understanding of gender – something that helps produce the outcome of “it all feels so comfortable and natural”.If indeed it were true that gender changes… then we would have to ask what are the factors that cause the change. And if we knew how gender changes then it wouldn’t be long before someone would suggest “a cure”. Why encourage someone with gender dysphoria to change their presentation or sex when we can fix their gender instead?
No… I’m happy with a constant gender – keeps the shrinks and doctors at bay!
But I’m the only person who really understands my gender.
So there has to be a possibility it is just a figment of my imagination and it doesn’t actually exist. Real or imagined I’m very happy being “me”!! -
I agree with Adrian’s comment. I do not need to change my gender because my gender is transgender; I am neither male nor female, but a combination of both and will always be happy to remain so.
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I wouldn’t be able to be a woman if gender didn’t exist. I’m not sure if I like that.
On a practical level though it would make life somewhat easier if gender didn’t exist.
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It is a conundrum of sorts isn’t it. Gender is mostly identified in the physical identity we have, i.e. male or female, then a hermaphrodite confuses it a little in the physical identity state, but I have for nearly 50 years been fighting a battle with my mind and perhaps sub-conscious desires against my physically determined gender (Male) in that I have an increasing over time desire to be fully feminine and womanly, to be the female form. Transitioning in my current situation is not really an option (though it is my most heartfelt desire) without exploding a nuclear emotional bomb into the life I have,and destroying all the love and relationships I have established in my lifetime to date. I look back and can see from an early age, the wiring was different from the physical form I inherited since birth, I can operate as a male but now the overwhelming desire is to be dressed as a woman as often as I can, and I visualize myself in the perfect female form, and would love to be able to have the true female lifestyle. Gender has been varied over time and it seems that the cultural norms that exists from time to time in various generations and time periods influence what is acceptable “gender behaviour” but does not necessarily equate with the traditional gender physique (male/female) the mind appears to be where true gender identity begins and if the mind agrees with the physical state there is no conflict, but when it does not, then the minds gender identify fights against the current physical identity to try and bring a realignment that brings us to the gender turmoil of trying to conform to the minds view, hence why so many of us are in a state of gender warfare against our mind and try to seek the physical solution the mind demands, and that is the curse of it. If there were no traditional boundaries of what constitutes gender, then we would all be so much freer and we would become more human and genderless and we could live as we wished in accord with our mind and the world wouldn’t care.
We would be normal in any form we chose to live in, and would be valued for who we really are not who society thinks we should be because of a societal gender formula. Love to all. -
It is probably true to say that gender is indeed a construct of our mind that develops over time. It has no necessary link to our physical parts. It takes a child quite some time to determine if they are male or female, and when they do decide there are plenty of environmental constraints to push them in one direction or other, e.g. choice of toys, games, friends, washrooms, etc. Many of us have had the experience of being outed by a pestery young child who, in trying to discover their own gender status, questions ours (often in supermarkets!!). How terrible are these cute little three-year-olds!!
Even though society has this predilection for binary categorisation, male, female and no other, most thoughtful people understand that gender is a fluid concept, so much so that some of us may have no gender at all (good on you Norrie for being the real you). Every time we scan a crowd in a shopping mall we know that there are no true males and no true females. There are lots of people who lie at various positions on the gender continuum. It is important therefore that we try to be true to our own concept of gender. It is good to be more of one gender one day and more of another gender the next day, or it is equally fine to be committed to a life in one gender or even none at all. Like the weather, one day it’s sunny and another day it’s wet and miserable (like it is in central NSW right now!).
Transgender is a difficult concept as people are always moving between one gender role and another, perhaps only in a subtle fashion most of the time. We are the blessed ones who can live part or all of our lives in a gender role that is completely different to that with which we were most likely trained as a young person. Altering physical details to reconcile the permanence of the rebirthed gender role is just one way in which we can all feel comfortable with ourselves and others. This is a natural process, one that is deeply entrenched in all societies. So why do we worry so much about those gender warriors who want us to conform to their disturbed view of a binary gender reality that is just not true?
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We can talk all around this subject and still be no clearer as we will have to agree on what gender really is before we can discuss it’s existence. The common swapping of “gender” for “sex” annoys me ( as does less and fewer!!) but that said, if we can agree that gender “roles” are what we are talking about, then they are clearly social constructs and therefore each is free to adopt or reject them as is their wont.
In any discussion there is too much emphasis put on how one “chooses” to act as a pointer to ones gender and this I think muddies the water.If it is an innate thing then it is indefinable really as everyone will have their own version of it and discussion is pointless. You are you and I am me…end of!!
Whether Society can get to this point of acceptance is another matter but mostly one is not subject to torture and forced renunciation of one’s beliefs..not in our Society ..so far!!!I agree with Rachael, that we are taught as children to act in a particular way ( though I have had to concede lately, as I watch my 3 granddaughters grow up, that Nature plays a bigger role than I have previously believed) and as adults we still cling to these lessons somewhat, which I think explains the guilt one feels when we buck Mummy’s expectations, even as a 60 year old!! Healthy evolution of a Self however, demands that we find who we really are( what makes us feel most comfortable?)and put Daddy and Mummy’s lessons where they belong, behind us.
In the end I think that we can never REALLY know who we are as there as so many genetic, social and biological factors at play in our lives and that these factors change from moment to moment. Any attempt at fixing a SELF in time and space is as useless as trying to catch the essence of a mountain stream by taking a bucketful of water home to show people.
This is the stuff of much philosophy and I think we would be better off accepting that we must make choices as to how we want to express our ” Self”( we call this expression, a PERSONALITY, after the mask in Greek theatre…the PERSONA)but any mention of Choice is taboo it seems, in the TG world, many preferring to think themselves automatons without any power over their circumstances.
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Well in my opinion for what it’s worth, is that all such things are in the mind, sure you are created and evolve into either a male or female body, and society continually conditions one to identify with that body, but inside you are a soul that perceives your sexuality.
I have always perceived myself as female, and ignore the impressions that others have of me.
People gain an impression of you at first sight, as in a shopping mall, at first sight they may think you are a woman by the way you dress, then they may look deeper and think you are a manly woman or transvestite and be unsure, it is irrelevant what they think, it is what you think you are and identify with.
You can’t change DNA but you can modify your body to a certain degree, so does gender really exist, well only in your or others own mind.
Your body is a carcass that consists of blood and bone and has been created by the food you have been fed or eaten. Your spirit that inhabits your body is non-sexual and of the gender of your own choosing.
Lacey x x -
Gender exits, but has no relevance without an awareness of sexuality. In my opinion gender and sexuality cannot be disentangled. They are indivisible components of our self which combine to make us what we are.
Ruth
