Experiences of panic when shopping in public

[Anonymous]

I must admit to being hopeless shopping in Ladies areas. I panic and look around and wonder back to the male area then back to the dresses, I’m certainly a dead give away !

At the check out I’m all sweaty and nervous – I must give the check out girls a laugh ! Once buying a wig the girl said we sell a lot of these to guys, I replyed “its for the wife” of course but I don’t think I convinced her as she just smiled ! :

Good topic Sarah, it is something one can look back at and have a good laugh.

[Anonymous]

what do I say to myself I’m panic, get out run for the door. Like most girls who don’t the public they go through the shopping centres walk through the ladies section to get to the men’s.
About a month ago drove two suburbs away to go to target, by my first set of new shoes it was weekday about 10.30 am walked straight to the shoe section wandered up and down the rows picked up a nice red closed toe 4 inch heel, tried them on.
There are two things I learned from its first no one really looks at you in the shoe section but yet again there was no one there at that time. I just walk to the counter with my red shoes sales staff didn’t even look at me when I bought them they just took the money. The second thing I found out that day I am a perfect size 10 in target footwear.
The next challenge is to buy a dress, or a skirt. But what I seen next challenge it seen since I started dressing again, I really need to lose the weight. No longer able to get into size 14 and have a loose fit I find myself in a size 16 not happy so the next big challenge is to get back down to 14 I really mean 12.

[Anonymous]

I mostly shop as a boy if they can tell, the other day me and my friend where in Big W in the bra section and this young lady past us and said as she past sorry girls cause she sort of got in our way.
Im still scared of things like that but getting more comfortable.
The other day I went to a party as myself short skirt and pretty top and it was an normal party about 20 people and half didn’t know I wasn’t a girl until my friend with the big mouth told everyone.

[Anonymous]

Hi,

Whilst syhopping in K-Mart a couple of years ago I wanted to buy some undies. I was all male at the time but so what. I was perusing the bra isle when I heard the announcement “Security to ladies underware”.

I just stood there, thinking to myself lets bring it on, I have every right to shop for any goods on public sale.

Some moments later a very young man stuck his head around the corner. I stood and looked at him (I never was a nice looking person) he lasted about 3 secs then was gone. No more hassels and I brought 2 bras. 👿

Just be yourself Joanne_1

[Anonymous]

I have been full time for a while now and shopping doesn’t phase me anymore – ususally.

BUT, I recently had an important work function and I needed a gown. Now, if I am going to spend $300+ on a piece of clothing (the old suit doesn’t cut it any more – and besides I gave it to my dad) I AM going to try it on first.

I was all confident when I started. Looking around, seeing what I wanted. And then the SP asks me what I was looking for. Still confident and not worried at all, I explained about the function. She pulls out this gorgeous dress and told me that it would look fantastic on me. “Go and try it on!” Argghhh. All those fears I thought I would never have to face ever again. The adrenalin surged through my body. I was being attended to personally and the immediate thought is that these SP’s have a bad habit of sticking their noses INTO the change room while you are getting dressed. But, I sucked it up and tried to act all calm and as though I had done it a hundred times before. I can’t believe how much sweat one can produce in such a short time with so little effort. Then she procedes to bring in dress after dress to try on and parade. No hiding in the changeroom allowed apparently. I ended up buying the first dress and my heart didn’t give out in the process.

Well, if she did notice anything, she was fantastic about it. No mention was ever made to my gender status – even if she did pick me – I can’t see how she wouldn’t (this is one of those situations where camoflage gives up). I received excellent service and she even took me next door for some shoes she thought would match. The conversation flowed freely between us and the other girls in the shop (it’s amazing how they get the others to chorus in on how great their clothes look on you). I ended up spending almost double what I had budgeted but the experience was well worth it.

And the gown on the night got lots of compliments (it was my first work do as the real me). It highlighted the curves I have achieved so far, minimised those I wanted to hide and displayed my feminine attributes for all and sundry. It’s amazing how people stop talking to your face. LOL 😉

[Anonymous]

Iam a regular shopper, and i will walk into any shop anywhere, i tell the sales person i am a crossdresser and can i try the garment on,except for under wear,never had a bad experience,i think it’s all about confidence,it’s all to easy, i have too many outfits,i need to stop shopping.

Moderator

Quote:

This thread is wandering off topic. It’s title is “Experiences of panic when shopping in public” so clearly is NOT the place to tell everyone how you don’t have any such experiences! Please stick to the topic!!

[Anonymous]

I’ve been shopping too much lately and have got much better with it… I just go ahead and don’t worry about anyone now, some of the ladies running the shop or at the check out in the bigger stores sometimes say something about a gift or buying for someone else and I just agree with them. I have found listening to my ipod to be a good distraction whilst looking about the larger stores… in the end the end product for them is a sale so they aren’t really worried. I have even told a few that I am shopping for me and they are usually friendly about it. One girl at David Jones said to me recently “Do you know you are in the womens section..?” and I just looked her in the eye and replied “Yes, I know that!” with a hint of sarcasm…
The key to the whole shopping thing is confidence and not worrying.

[Anonymous]

Hi Sarah,

I shop when I can and have found it great to do, shopping = sport. I did have one experience at DFO where it was hot and my makeup wore off – showing some facial hair, which I discovered when was trying on a dress. Worse than that I was at the opposite end of the center to my car. I had no choice but to walk though the shops. All I could do was walk though the shops – I felt like everyone could tell. I felt like a wreck and drove off. I did manage to compose myself a bit and re-applied my makeup and bought some groceries before I went home. I was glad that I didn’t quit on myself.

Brenda Jane

[Alison_2]

I would always panic because of the fear of something being said to me and not knowing how to react back. The more I panicked the more I stood out. I would freeze when spoken to, go very red and get out of the shop as fast as possible.

Smaller shops were more of a problem but I found a way round my fear by telling the assistant I was a crossdresser and asking if I could return either just before they opened or just after they closed to do my shopping. This worked very well especially when buying bra’s, undies and shoes.

Buying makeup would send me into panic mode more than anything else until one day I built up the courage and walked trembling into Priceline, told the shop assistant I would like to try various makeup for myself and would she help me. She was fantastic, took me aside, helped me, applied makeup on me and helped me decide what worked best. I knew other women were looking at me but the young girl just kept my attention away from them.

[Anonymous]

I experienced an embarrassing event one day, I went into a ladies wear shop in the main road of the shopping centre of Belmont in Newcastle,, I was on my break from work and parked my company service vehicle just up the road from the shop, I browsed in the shop for 10 minutes in my work clothes, was polite and refused any assistance when asked and left when there was nothing that took my fancy.
two days later my boss in Sydney rang me and said that the shop assistant had followed me out of the shop back to my work vehicle , taken my registration number and reported me to the police who in turn rang him and wanted to know if he knew his employee was perusing womens clothes in a ladies wear shop.
My response was I was looking for a gift for my wife, hopefully he believed me

[Melissa_Mills]

Wow Loretta, that sounds like a nightmare.
I thought that some of the experiences with sales assistants that I’ve had were bad and I’ve been tempted to tell them to “mind their own business”, I wonder what made that assistant think that a man shopping for womens stuff warranted a call to the police?
I wonder if her ignorance is limited to gender or would she be equally bigoted against race, age, height, weight etc

Melissa

[Anonymous]

Loretta,

Maybe that lady had taken all this anti-terrorism stuff too much to heart and was just trying to be “Alert but not alarmed”.

She may have, in her misguided way,thought you were a would-be ‘terrorist’ seeking out a disguise in order to carry out his nefarious schemes.

She may have thought, “You never know, I may be preventing a tragedy from happening. Better to be safe than sorry”. Stupid, sure, but you never know, with some people.

But your experience would be a one in a million happening. Don’t let it bother you.

I had an old lady salesperson, in a St Vinnies shop, say to me, as I was buying a white satin nightie( it was gorgeous- too nice to sleep in), That’ll look nice on you”, in a loud voice. I answered, “You better believe it, lady”., took my purchase and walked out.

[Elizabeth]

I guess everyone has some horror tale of shopping. St. Vinnies ladies are usually somewhat ignorant around transgenderism and the like. They can be very forthright. The larger stores, DJ’s, Myers have sales assistants who are basically trained in accepting the purchasing of clothes by crossdressers etc. They’re not stupid, but then it doesn’t really matter, it’s a case of a sale and money. I have always (of latter years) told them the purchases are for me. I have had no problem, in fact once that’s out of the way they can go to extraordinary lengths to helpful.

Heads up and keep going.

Liz

[Adrian]

Moderator

Quote:

This thread has had to be edited as somehow few people take the time to read what the thread is about – yes experiences of panic when shopping. Not “How I go shopping”. So lots of posts have gone form this thread. Some to a sister topic because they contain helpful hints about shopping – and the rest into the members section because the content was nothing more than “all about me”.

[Fay]

Well I can relate to a panic attack some years ago before I gained my confidence. I was in Target and had picked up two size 16C bras, some size 16 panties and some size 8 black 5″ pumps. I was in the line for the cash register with my story about the wife’s birthday with gift wrap and card in hand as a decoy when I notice that the checkout lady was a friend of my wife and she had spotted me. She would KNOW my wife was a size 10, 4’10” with size 5½ foot. PANIC!!!!

I thought about bluffing my way out but she could dob me in for being a crossdresser or for having a mistress – don’t know which would have been worse! So I gave a little wave, turned around and changed the goodies for my wifes size! Bonus for wife! (She didn’t like the shoes, too high so she canged them later)

Fay had to wait for her goodies until I could go to another Mall. Moral of the story – shop out of area or at least “check out the check out”

Hugs,

Fay