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How do you feel when somone says something feminine to you?
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I would imagine that I would accept the compliment as it was supposed to be intended. A compliment is better than a rebuke or anything that is meant to hurt rather than heal. If you receive a compliment you should be a happier person within.
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When I go into a restaurant or shop the wait staff or shop assistants nearly always address me as madam – may I help you madam, what would you like madam. Whether they really see me as a woman or are just being polite it nevertheless gives me a buzz!
The other evening I (as Jane) went to dinner with a MM friend. The rather young waitress came over and asked ‘Guys, would you like to order?’. I was taken aback somewhat; but said nothing and ordered. I said to my friend did the waitress read me? He said not to worry as that is how many young girls and guys address each other regardless of their gender. I then realised that I as a MM have done the same thing when a group of people are involved and are mixed male and female i.e. addressed the group as ‘guys’.
So I was OK with it but still…….I like the old fashion way!
Jane
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Quote:So I was OK with it but still…….I like the old fashion way!A few years back, when I was involved with a youth movement (in purely male-mode) I used to refer to the young people as “guys and girls” until one day a young lady said to me “You’re pretty old fashioned. You can call us all just guys, you know.” I did from then on and never had a problem. So being called a ‘guy’ isn’t necessarily a bad thing nowadays, it’s just an inclusive term.
Like you though Jane, I too like the old fashion way.
Once, when shopping en femme with my good lady at the markets in Sydney I was included in the question “Can I help you ladies?” and a bit later on a woman at one of the stalls called me “Darling” a couple of times during our conversation. I must admit that I did get a bit of a buzz out of those experiences.
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Being Chloe everyday, I get my fair share of positive references to my feminine presentation. In the last 3 days however I have received 3 comments that basically made me glow.
At work last Saturday a lady said to me, in the presence of her husband & children that I looked very attractive & she now regretted not wearing makeup that day. Wow! what a compliment. She wasn’t suggesting that I personally was a ‘beauty’ but rather that my overall presentation was appealing to her. I felt accepted as a woman by a woman & she also stroked my ego with regard to my ‘taste’.This morning I went to the dentist. The receptionist was in the surgery when I entered. Upon returning to the desk she looked at me & in the presence of the just finished patient, said ‘Gosh you’ve got nice clothes Chloe’, I just about melted. She continued with ‘after you left the other day we were all discussing how nice that black & white outfit was & how well dressed you always are’, well you could have scooped me up off the floor at that stage.
I didn’t think I could feel any more validated than being praised by women my own age. My next stop this morning was at an establishment selling blinds & curtains.
Even though I was served by a blind lady, she was still able to lift my spirits even higher when she told me that she wished her hairdresser were here right now so she could see my hair colour. She said how much she liked my hair style & colour.I don’t believe in these particular instances that the ladies were being patronising.
How did it make me feel?… Accepted as a woman, & validated in regard to my ability to assemble an outfit. No vanity, just real appreciation.
It’s so nice to be able to speak to other women, about subjects that appeal to most women, as a woman & be accepted whilst doing so. Lovely!N.B. all of these women (along with everybody else) is aware that I am Tg, I’m certainly no hottie who they mistook for a natal female.
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Quote:Even though I was served by a blind lady, she was still able to lift my spirits even higher …
Ah, I see. (I can’t believe you went there, and I followed.)
Quote:I don’t believe in these particular instances that the ladies were being patronising.How did it make me feel?… Accepted as a woman, & validated in regard to my ability to assemble an outfit. No vanity, just real appreciation.
It’s so nice to be able to speak to other women, about subjects that appeal to most women, as a woman & be accepted whilst doing so. Lovely!Of course it helps when you have a good sense of style and an ability to put together colour combinations that work. I was once given a back-handed indication of acceptance: “Now you can show poor dress sense in two genders.” Sadly, she was pretty spot on the mark. Oh well.
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One of the interesting things I have come to realise about my TG life is that I take a lot more care about my looks, wardrobe and womens fashion. My MM self just does what is necessary with maybe a bit of flare; but as Jane I am forever looking at what other women wear, what is in the current mags (even at the hairdressers or dentist, I leaf through the girls mags) and think what would suit me, can I afford it, will my bum look too big (I hope so!
). I seem to take a different view on these things which I did not previously….hmmmmm. I am not sure where it goes but it is fun and that is what I like about it.Jane
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I dont remember any positive comments about my male self probably cause I dont like that way of being it doesn’t register, but seems I can remember loads for the female me and hell it makes me feel so right inside. Validation is the best feeling I know well at the moment at least.
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I like Jane have found myself looking more to the female clothes and fashion than male , not that i have really ever followed fashion .
But another interesting thing i have found which my partner pointed out to me is that i dont seem to care about the price of say a dress or lingerie , shoes etc when shopping for my fem side , where as if im shopping for the male side im …well cheap so to speak …
I found this interesting myself but had not realised how true this was .
And as for a fem comment i have been extreemly lucky to have had a couple and yes it makes me feel soooo good , a few cab drivers and waiters etc when i have been out with my partner or friends and they refer to us as ladies ….well it just feels great .
Petra -
simple it makes me feel great.It can be something small ,as just an eye glance as you walk by someone it have the power to lift you up and feel wonderful
salleyj -
The shop assistant said “excuse me ladies” as she squeezed past Vicki and myself in a supermarket isle recently. As Salleyj says above, it has the power to lift you up and make you feel great for the rest of the day. Pamela
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Love your sentiments.XN
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I had it a couple of times when my natural hair was longer and I wasn’t dressed or wearing makeup….. loved it.
I’m now growing my hair long agian!
MJ
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I had it a couple of times when my natural hair was longer and I wasn’t dressed or wearing makeup….. loved it.
I’m now growing my hair long agian!
MJ
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It happened to me again recently.
While out shopping for new shoes a sales assistant addressed me as ‘Madam’ and after a discussion of my requirements she looked me approvingly up and down and was told I had a figure most women would die for… ‘Oh what a feeling’
