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lesbian transphobia
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My heart goes out to you Christina. What you have had to bare. Having met you briefly I could see that you are a strong woman. Thank the stars for that. But even the strong amongst us feel the deep hurt of barbs such as you have experienced.
“Heads held high”? Yes and yes again Kelly. Its not easy to take the knocks as many would attest too. But we can be and are proud trans women. I think it most excellent that you have found a wonderful woman to share with.
There will always be those that attack us. But believeing in ourselves is I think so important. I am a new girl and have really only little experience to give my opinion. But sorry I’m a bit opinionated
My week in Sydney was my first decent length of time as myself (ie a trans woman) in every way I currently know. And you know I never had a single negative experience, public transport all the time and everything. I might just have been lucky, I dont know. It is early days.
I have like many already had knock backs, some big, some small. But I know who I am and I love who I am now. I chose a small hotel in the backstreets of Burwood, Sydney for cheap rates. I found that the place was lovely and the Manager was lesbian. She invited me for a cuppa on the last day I was there. And she was so lovely. So accepting. We talked of both of our experiences. And you know they werent that different.
And its these positive things I carry with me and the strength from the support I have from family and friends. In reflection I think the original article is one of sadness. As one girl earlier said (sorry dont know how to read posts again once I’m writing to find ur name- is there a way?) this woman has been deeply hurt and probably abused by a man. Does it excuse her abuse towwards us. Absolutely not. And if it happened in a real life situation to one of us it would be devastating to whoever it happened to.
As Kelly Said though (or I perceived it) we need to seek out and focus on positive acceptance and reinforcement if we can and wherever we can. That way lies much better things for us and that way we stay sane and as happy as we can be: hopefully very happy
Every day I feel proud of getting here to who I know I am. Hate mail and bigots, please leave me alone. Go tell your mate(s) who positively reiforce your sad negativity. Me, I faught for years to get here. And no one can take that away.
Yes, live proud girls. Stand tall! God I sound like some tin pot General!!!!
But you know what I mean. We are who we are and we deserve the best!!
Go well girls. One of my girlfriends years ago was always on at me about posture. And she was soooo right. Standing tall, walking/gliding along like transwomen can and looking people in the eye without any slouching (or flinching) is not always easy but once practiced can work well. It tells anyone that you are comfortable with yourself and thats what matters.
Go get em, And I will too!
Love
Roisin x. -
The statements made by this woman are so over the top I really am at a loss as how to respond
I did not choose the way I am. Why would I. It has made my life difficult, I have problems trusting people with the truth of who I am and I have to keep parts of my life secret from everyone I know.
I did not choose the way I am any more than the writer of this incredible tirade did.
I grew up as a Catholic in a small Central Queensland town in the 80s. Everything was in my favour of becoming a racist homophobe. However I started dressing at a very young age. I was found out and humiliated twice in my childhood. While I never considered what I was doing as wrong, I realised others did.
It is remarkable that my gender identity experiences that started at the age of about four helped me overcome the institutionalised bigotry of my surroundings, were as her sexuality has only bred hate towards anyone born genetically male. Perhaps a psychologist could answer that one. Though, I should state in fairness that she is not a spokesperson for lesbian affairs.
I find it amazing and insulting how much she assumes we wish to do her physical harm. I have never been violent to a woman (genetic or trans) and never will be, no matter the provocation (and I have had worse than this woman has thrown at us). Her second assumption seems to be that we dress to have sex with lesbian women. I find this amazingly self centered on her part. We are transvestite/transgender, therefore we are trying to trick her into having sex with her. Maybe someone should mention to her that the universe does not revolve around her. Has she considered that people are not transwomen and transvestites just to try and have sex with a lesbian. Personally I would not like to have sex with her as it would be like putting my dick into a swirling vortex of hate.
I think she should visit the following website.;
http://www.mermaidsuk.org.uk/Maybe she’d like to release more venom laced nonsense at these innocent trans boys and girls.
Does her hatred of trans extend to transmen? If not, well double standards. If so, well she should see how happy these guys are…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r09Dajw0WqQ
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3itvXY4bj6E&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tJOZ2oeF2V0&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0iOLFrSeTes&feature=relatedIn short, her statements at the very least are insulting. She assumes we a violent women haters whose only goal is to violate lesbians. It’s insulting to anyone with gender dysphoria. I’d try and reason with her, but I realise it’s a waste of time. Hard core fanatics and fundamentalists never back down.
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Hi Girls , I must lead a charmed life in lesbian Community as i havnt come across any of these attitudes , just acceptance ! I totally agree with Kelly about getting on with your own life ect Cheers Ella-Kristine
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I find the whole transphobia comments sad irrespective as to who is making the disparaging remarks. Lesbians or otherwise, it’s depressingly sad. It seems to me the purpose behind hateful remarks is to generate fear. To some it is like ‘water off a duck’s back’. To others the fear generated is real. Try a man hating lesbian who is a close family member. To them we are all a bunch of loonies. I believe we all have experienced such attitudes sometime in our lives. Sad, very sad.
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I too must lead a charmed life, as I have not experienced this.
I work at the Alice Springs hospital, in the Medical Records Department, and heve to deal with all types of Doctors and Nurses as well as other Hospital staff and the general public, some whom are Lesbian, and as some of you may have heard Alice Springs is classified as the Lesbian Capital of the world, and I have had no problems with them or any other member of the hospital staff or the general public that I have come into contact with at work, no Derogatory terms, no use of inappropriate pro-nouns, (in the beginning the one’s that knew me, sometime’s slipped up, but it wasn’t deliberate , but it doesn’t happen any more), although outside of work, there is the odd person, who has known me since before I transitioned, who has said something, but they are usually the redneck idiots (both Caucasian and Indigenous) or, what I call, the born again Christian Bible basher, (Most of the Christians and people of other faiths that I know, don’t have an issue with me), but they are in the minority in my life and by this time most have given up there crusade against me, some have even come to accept me as a women. Those that don’t know me only see me as a woman and yes I do know this due to friends that know me and haven’t told their friends about me, their friends only know me as a woman.
Of Course I don’t know what is said when I am not around but if anything was said at work, I would hear about it on the grapevine
All the best
Hugs
Sharon -
I know these attitudes do exist, I think there are more lesbians out there who either don’t care about us at all, or even think it’s a good thing that genetic males want or have the need to be women. Isn’t imitation after all the sincerest form of flattery?
What gets on the nerves of the minority is that they see trans women as a threat what they view as their exclusive right to judge questions of gender.
I had this from Chinese people sometimes – also a tiny minority with extreme views. Get to a certatin point in a discussion and they would trot out “you’re not Chinese so you don;t understand”. Over the years my counter argument was to bring up Chinese people who agreed with me (lots of them), rather than arguing my case as if it were merely only my own opinion. That’s also the way to deal with these people.
The best thing to remember is that trans-friendly lesbians do exist. A bigot can shut out all arguments from his/her perceived “enemy”, but it’s much more difficult to do them when they come from tolerant and enlightened members of his/her own group.
I do realise that this is all rather philosophical…and perhaps not useful or applicable to real-life problems, but it’s good to think about I think.
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Hi All..Having read the original post,and subsequent replies on the subject,I think that rather then worry about a minority that seeks to vent their anger and frustrations( of whatever kind),we should focus on the positive’s in our lives…those that love and accept us,who care about us,and are positive uplifting influences on us…those that have hate filled views toward us will never go away,and while they my become fewer over the years,there will always remain a minority that will never accept us.I’m lucky that where I work,I have total acceptance from everyone,and fit in with all the women there.not all lesbians are like the one described,as many of you girls know from your own experience..about 8 months ago,I met a lesbian woman online,and even though she knew I was trans right from the start,we became close friends,and have since fallen very much in love with each other and have a wonderful relationship.those people like the one described have obvious and very deep seated issues within themselves,and the venom and hatred they spew through their behaviour is just the outward manifestation of what they feel inside….they are to be pitied more than anything,if the only way that they can make themselves feel better is to tear everyone else down…the best we can do is show them the opposite behaviour and attitude,hard though it may be at times.that way,it gives them less reason and ooportunity to attack us.
