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Some girls do….. Some girls don’t .. but should !!
OK Now that I have your attention for a moment !! ..
Please read on .. however the post is not about anything naughty !! its just that this issue has been on my mind for a while so thought it about time to post something and see opinions from others..
Something i’ve noticed at major events such as Transformal and even at mid week dining out nights is that Some of us don’t take the time to give any kind of compliment at all to another person on how they look. Yet on Facebook people obviously crave as many “likes” as they can get… Nothing wrong with that of course BUT!!
Surely it is much more satisfying when you are out in the company of others to actually say something nice to your companions and get a nice comment back in return.
If we cant make nice comments to each other when we are out socialising are we missing out on some important peer support ?
Cheers
Caroline -
6 Replies
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OK here we go… Walking on Eggshells with an Elephant in the Cupboard
Behaviour 1:
Craving likes, taking selfies, looking at oneself in the mirror, telling everyone about yourself. The actions of someone whose world is largely consumed by themselves. Someone feeling insecure in society at large.Behaviour 2:
Giving complements, being genuinely interested in others, being aware of their feelings, putting the needs of others first. These are the actions of someone who is outward looking, engaging with the world and presumably feeling confident.Now Caroline you say you see the first more than the latter?
I wouldn’t dare comment… but if it is true you don’t need a PhD to work out why.But hush – don’t wake up the elephant!
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Adrian
Just to make it very clearI just seem to observe Behaviour 1 more often than Behaviour 2
No elephants disturbed or eggshells cracked I thought ?
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AA, get with it! This is the Facebook generation where the self(ee) rules and criticism is a right. Compliments at work can get you fired for unwanted attention and talking to kids at the park can be seen as predation. Mind you I do all these things as I like people but believe that reality has to take precedence over bullshit so I say it and be hanged.
That said, the photos shown from Transformal so far have shown how stunningly beautiful you all looked. There, a compliment!!!
PS. I refuse to use an emoticon
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Wow. Talk about nailing it. I don’t do social media. I still view it as a way for school kids to bully each other outside of school time.
Is this a young folks thing? Gen Y. Missing attention from their Mum. Having mid life crisis’ at 30.
I would hope anyone who knows me would say i exhibit more behaviour 2 than 1. Especially since i usually try to avoid cameras. I do just sneak into gen x and i certainly will never allow myself to be labelled gen y.
Once every couple of years i do post a photo or two on here mainly to prove i…am…not…a…robot. -
There is no doubt Facebook has made massive changes,some very positive,in enabling people to interact on line. However I still regard that basic human aspect of face to face communication as something very important but seemingly slipping from everyday life.
I even experience emails from people only a few metres from me at work when they could have easily come over and spoken to me. I dont get it!!
My post reflected a degree of some frustration at the lack of verbal communication from some people who are serial FB posters, for example
How can some people walk into a group of people talking and not bother saying hello to everyone and just chat to one person they have obviously singled out for their attention. ?
It doesnt cost anything to say something nice to someone and it has immeasurable value to the recipient.
I’m old fashioned I guess but Adrians Two behaviour models seem to capture quite a few in Model 1,
Caroline
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Caroline, You’re simply looking for some balance. Absolutely nothing wrong with that! I’m a Facebook queen, and insta, and snap and plain old email, it’s all communication to me and that’s great, but crave the face to face and a rare compliment… Bliss!
