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To have kids or not?
Talking to someone the other day, and came up with an interesting dilemna.
My wife and I want to have kids. However, should I start HRT soon, then the window I have got to actually father kids would be very small. The problem though, well the problem that was brought up by this other person, is…
Is it fair on the child to be born into a relationship where one of us is going through some life altering changes?
in my opinion, if a child has two loving parents, of whatever gender, they are fine. They may be faced with ridicule at school, but everyone is faced with some kind of ridicule at school.
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6 Replies
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Hi Sarah,
I have been on HRT for 6 years, but I haven’t formally transitioned. I made the decision to have kids because my partner and I really wanted to share our lives with some youngsters. We have a loving family. The kids think I’m a little weird, but that’s OK. My issues are my issues. I’m their dad, but I’m just not like the other kids’ dads. I just try to be as honest as I can with them, although they are not really old enough to understand (ages 5 and 9). I think provided that your kids have 2 loving parents, then things will work out fine. It will depend greatly on your partner’s ability to “go with you” along this journey.
Best, Simone.
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I believe you can freeze a few ‘donations’ and use them later if you need them. I wouldn’t count on a long window otherwise. Within a few months I found there was nothing to ‘donate’.
Gwen -
In her book “She’s Not There”, the author Jenny Boylan tells how she went on premarin without telling her wife and proceeded to father two children in the next three years. The effect on the family is a different story. ..
From a personal point of view I don’t believe the children would suffer if your partner is genuinely and fully supportive of you. But that is something I would not want to have any doubt about.
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Hi ,
Take it from some one who has, have your children if you both would like & love them do it just do it. youll allways regret not if you dont .
we have 3, 31 34 35 & 8 grandkids under 12 our last one is just born by 3 1 / 2 weeks 4 girls 4 boys .
Okay think about , not now its later, im 63 as of now & would not have it any other way we are still as a close family . yeap wev been through it all the whole works we are still family . Dejarn is the one who was born when i steped out fully as a woman 7 y 7 m , & with out her i would have struggled she keeped me going,
Kaylyn does not know it she gave birth to Dejarn , she does not know she is my kid as tho i had given birth to her that is how close we are. even closer than our 3 , & we can go any where to gether . they accept at a younger age far better than later on . & theres nothing Dejarn does not know about me ,
any way just my thoughts on haveing your own children.…noeleena…
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Hi Sara,
My son was conceived AFTER I’d commenced HRT. (I was never prescribed androgen blockers). He’s never known other than Christina.
Jim has grown into a bright and intelligent young man; was School Captain of a Christian School – says something about the stability and values taught at home. The only issue he has is when people ask him to explain me. There’s nothing to explain for him. He just accepts that I am his father/parent, whatever label.
Children are just the most amazing blessing
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I am a bit late but will chime in anyway.
The most important thing in the world to me is my family. If you and your wife wish to have children and have thought about what this will mean to your future plans and relationship and still want to go ahead with it then I think you should.Children are hard work and can stress you out to the max but at the end of the day those little bundle of joys make it all worth while.
Rach
