-
hormone question – what is female sex drive?
I have a question about hormone therapy.
The reduction in male sex drive I can understand but then I hear talk of “increase in female sex drive”.
What is female sex drive, could somebody please explain this.
The idea of have real breasts is very very very tempting and I would like to see what it feels like to have female levels of female sex hormones in my body.
thanks
Vicki -
18 Replies
-
Hi Vicki
What is female sex drive? Never having had a male one (depite the masculine body) I’ll see if I can explain it.
Cuddling, kising, licking and so on is far more enjoyable. Calling it “foreplay” really isn’t accurate, it’s possible to O both multiply and continuously with zero genital involvement if your brain is set up that way. Guys in general aren’t. Some women are, but not all. And some TS women like having the mindblowing “rush” of a male O, and don’t want to give it up.
Fenales, when aroused, have their whole body becomes far more sensitive. Oh yes, HRT will make your skin far more sensitive anyway, it has to be experienced to be believed. But also fragile, you will get cuts and bruises from everyday activity until you learn how to adapt. A Female O is a whole-body experience, where the genitals may be the centre, or it may be diffused. Until a TS woman has had SRS, it’s likely to be diffused, as having male genitalia is very psychologically disturbing for some.
Breasts – well, if you develop there, the first thing is, they’re going to hurt. It’s like having a deep bruise. This can last for months or years if you take low doses of hormones. The nipples can vary in sensitivity, I lucked out there.
My recommendation: anyone not TS is better staying off HRT. They do things to your mind, and long term use makes some of the effects permanent, and if you have any attachment whatsover to staying male in any way, part- or full- time, especially sexually, leave them alone. If you’ve ever enjoyed sex in a male role, HRT is poison, even if you develop nice looking tits. Short term use may act as a diagnostic tool, and be harmless. If you find your interest in sex zeroes, then discontinue use. If it vastly increases… then you’re going to be faced with some very difficult decisions.
If you are TS – with a female brain in a male body – start HRT and you may find yourself waking up in the middle of the night literally screaming in climax, from an X-rated dream. And desperately wishing your real body matched your dreams, even though that will cost tens of thousands, and involve lots of pain, time, physical risk, and totally wreck your life as you’ve been living it until now.
This can, er, come as a bit of a surprise if it happens. It did to me, the first time at least.
Just my 2c worth, based on personal experience – been on HRT for all of 9 weeks… and I now have a strong libido, where it was very weak before (and female, not that I knew that for much of my life). Now to get the body adjusted to match, and I can really start living as I always should have.
Hugs, Zoe
This was found on another site… It is a 7 page paper by Dr. Richard J. Curtis 10th July 2009 The London Gender Clinic http://www.gires.org.uk/assets/Medpro-Assets/Progesterone.pdf Moderator
Quote:WARNING TgR is not a medical forum and any comments you may read in TR forums are only the opinions of the member posting. You should not assume that a posting on TR implies any verification or independent review and whilst the advice is honestly offered it is made without knowledge of your particular medical conditions. You should always seek professional medical advice before taking any action that might affect your health. -
Wellllllll interesting.
Thanks Zoe
I really need more conformation but I am tending to think that some of what you describe exist in both male and female but will vary a great deal from person to person.
I am definitely male but I seem to have erotic spots in pretty much the same places as females. Inner wrists, armpit, neck, nipples and almost all of the body if the touch is light, slow and generally in a circular motion. One day my partner and I spent quite a while experimenting with bringing each other to orgams by carressing wrists. Yes I can orgasm by being carressed in the right spot too.
My partner also indicated I am much more willing to be intimate and I find she gives me the chance to express my need to soft and gentle.
Try breath sychronisation when kissing /cuddling (you breath in as she is breathing out etc) this intensifies the feeling of being intimate.
I am definitely not macho but who cares. Experiencing the happiness you have generated in someone else is the most wonderful feeling in the world.The secret of a good relationship is to enjoy the happiness in your partner.
When we first started having sex she said “are sure you are not a woman”.
I had a great laugh. I was the first fella she had even met that had non-genital orgasms. Even kissing sometimes.
No wonder she hangs onto me so tight. There could be three types. upper body, tummy area and very low down involving the pelvic floor muscles.The only thing I can put this down to is some very advanced meditation practices I did in 1991.
Meditation increases self awareness and increased sensitivity to touch and emotion. Releases blocked emotion. By concentrating on her emotions and her body movements to know how she is feeling I am orgasming in anticipation of her orgasming (non genital type)
Is this type of thing they are talking about????????
Hugs
Vicki -
Quote:When we first started having sex she said “are sure you are not a woman”.
I had a great laugh. I was the first fella she had even met that had non-genital orgasms. Even kissing sometimes.
…
Is this type of thing they are talking about????????Hugs
VickiVicki, it is EXACTLY what I’m talking about, yes. Your brain is wired up for female sex – but it may be wired up for male sex too. Mine wasn’t.
With Hormones, you may be faced with a choice: intensify the first at the expense of diminishing or elminating the second.
One is like a bottomless cup of Hot Chocolate, laced with Tia Maria. The other is like a shot of raw whisky, far more intense, like an epileptic fit, but soon over.
I know which one I prefer. But others will differ. Fortunately, if you only take Hormones for a few months, the effects are reversible. Be careful though, I’d recommend patches, gel, or sublingual rather than oral administration of oestrogen, especially if you’re over 40. Less stress on the liver, and less chance of DVT etc.
As for anti-androgens… do some research. I’m on Androcur, but unless you’re willing to be put on a list of sexually deviant males who have volunteered for chemical castration, it will cost $300 a bottle, not $28.I wish you the best. But be careful – you may find out your feminine feelings will intensify so much that you have to transition. If you can possibly avoid this, do so. It’s incredibly difficult. Of course, if you’re TS, it’s also the best thing you will ever have done in your life.
I’d really recommend seeking professional guidance before embarking on hormones. Try and determine just who Vicki is.
No matter what, i wish you all the very best, and your partner too. And please accept a few hugs too, Zoe
This was found on another site… It is a 7 page paper by Dr. Richard J. Curtis 10th July 2009 The London Gender Clinic http://www.gires.org.uk/assets/Medpro-Assets/Progesterone.pdf
Moderator
Quote:WARNING TgR is not a medical forum and any comments you may read in TR forums are only the opinions of the member posting. You should not assume that a posting on TR implies any verification or independent review and whilst the advice is honestly offered it is made without knowledge of your particular medical conditions. You should always seek professional medical advice before taking any action that might affect your health. -
For quite a while I have been trying to understand where my orgasming ability came from. This also includes increased sensitivity to touch such as sensitive erotic spots you might say. My spots appear to be in the same spot and very similar sensitivity as a genetic female. On day my girlfriend made me orgasm by caressing me on the wrist, if anything I am sensitive than she is.
When i talk about this to most guys they give me a look as if I am crazy or from a different planet. Guys don’t orgasm like that they say.
I am trying to find the source of the gift. The gift to touch a girl in that gently way that creates such a wonderful feeling. I know what it feels like, I experience it.
When in my mid 20s I was definitely not like this.
The only thing that it might be, believe it or not is some very advanced meditation techniques I learned 15 years ago. Could be related to Kundalini.
Be very careful Kundalini is a very dangerous thing to experiment with. It translates to the yoga of transformation normally represented by a coiled snake. Kundalini is sometimes translated to “she who is coiled”
Any experiences like this?
Keep smiling
Vicki -
While concurring with Zoe’s comments, I would like to offer (perhaps) a more simpler view.
The average male’s exploration of his own sexuality usually extends to achieving orgasm (i.e. ejaculation) either with a partner or by his own hand (if you pardon the pun). This is best paraphrased in the well worn joke – “Q: What is the difference between the G-Spot and a Public Bar? A: Most guys can find the public bar.”
As members of a fortunate group who have discovered and indeed explored our feminine side, we are – as Zoe sates “Wired” up for feminine, and in my opinion male sex as well. This enables us to explore deeper pleasures in our love making. For mine, I have some “G-Spots” in some amazing places and have found some in partners that they did not realise they had.
Julie
-
Well……….my hrt has really put meaning to the term” couldn’t give a f*#k”
Nothing arouses me and im as turned on by a sexy piece of flesh as i would be by a cardboard box.
I have had issues in the past though, with out big noting my last woman wore an AVO as she persistently wanted more sex, the angryer and rougher i got the more she liked it, talk about frustrating …
The one before that said she wasn’t attracted to me but what i did in bed was soo good.
So that may be my underlying issues, but i just don’t get horny, at all.. none, zip, zero.
I wont blame the hrt but i will say its a major contributor.Maddy
-
i myself enjoy the increased sensitivity of sex now that im a year on hormones.
However i’ve found that decreased drive and a larger emphasis on ones emotional state at the time have put a halt to all sexual activity for me.
I’m only young, i havent had years to work out emotional coping skills etc so going on hormones brought my emotional problems into the bedroom
Thats not to say i dont want it or try for it or enjoy trying, i just dont succeed and my mind wanders… im fine on my own though.. its just an anxiety thing.
also i believe being on progesterone doesnt help, so as an experiment, this month i wont take any.
I have found i miss functioning sexually as a male, but i think it has more to do with never finding out how to become functional as a female..
-
With sex drives I think we are all different and at the end of the day after hrt some of us will be not interested in sex period, while others will maintain a sexual drive right through. My own personal experience went sort of like this: starting with the ‘well I’m glad that’s gone’ referring to the male sex drive. I still had one but it was very, very diminished and I no longer ‘had’ to have sex. As time went on and the hormones rewired my body and brain I regained a sexual reponse that was located differently and was even more intense than my male drive although I still did not ‘have’ to have sex. It’s very difficult to actually put into words but it’s in total contrast to a male sex drive….more along the whole of body orgasm thing. And very female……I used to say it felt estrogen driven. Post srs this is the drive I kept. So for some of us there is definitely a female sex drive….it’s not easy to explain what it feels like…and not everyone gets it…but for those that do it eclipses anything you ever felt when your body was testosterone driven.
-
A lot of what has been said in this thread is true of a ” male sex drive ” as one gets older. I think that the sex experience with a partner where there is no anxiety over outcomes, a real tuning in to the reactions of your partner , deep feelings of intimacy ( emotional rather than sexual, eg having a relationship where you both are comfortable about talking about your feelings and seeing each others world view) and a focus on the pleasure of the partner, are really getting close to a female sexuality IMO.
Most younger men ( and I was one once!) are far too concerned with performance and ego to really see a woman’s needs IMO and if you add to that fact of trying to hide your own sexuality and keep the secret that you see yourself as a woman and may even be thinking about that as you make love, then you are divided from yourself and your partner.
It starts with being open about yourself and being your real self ( for both partners) before you can really start getting in to the real guts of good sex , in my experience . A woman once told me that good sex starts at breakfast the day before you are in bed together ( in other words , trust , lack of tiredness, cooperation in your lives together and real intimacy , are more important than technique and hormones, when it comes to love making.
A ” female sex drive ” is in the head not in the hormones IMO. -
Hi Christine, mine definitely changed with hormones. Took about 12 months for the change. The sexual responses I have now are nothing like my pre hormone ones. And of course for a woman it does start in the head….if you don’t feel like it it’s not happening….I have just gone two months without feeling like it due to external pressures….but my physical responses are still different now….I have a distinctly female (and multiple) orgams and a whole of body response that I didn’t have before hormones and srs. I had developed the capacity for multiple orgasms pre srs to remove that from the equation. It just intensified post srs.
Hormone driven female sexuality? It exists!
Gwen -
Gwendoline , I am not doubting your own experience but how does this hormonal factor include all the different levels of hormones in women’s bodies , that must be present in the female population? Surely these differences in levels must preclude generalization?
As for the skill of ” multiple orgasm” , I think that I too experience these at times ( by myself) but this is due to a new technique of sexual practice that I have developed for myself. As I have not had these before , I find it hard to say that I definitely experience them but they are more intense and seem to last a long time, compared to the past anyway. -
Quote:If you find your interest in sex zeroes, then discontinue use. If it vastly increases…
To add and to disagree, sex drive is not an indication, and will probably not give meaningful results.
I had sex drive, I went on HRT, nothing changed except the ‘early rising’ stopped. I was switched from Spironolactone to Androcur and my sex drive vanished. I persuaded the doctor to switch me back to Spiro after 9 months and my sex drive returned a little (and it took a long time), progesterone was added to my medication list and the sexdrive vanished again.
I know a few GGs who have been using progesterone implants as their contraceptive and they too have lost sex-drive. One recently came off the implants and within a few months turned into a sex crazed maniac.
Androcur is used to ‘chemically castrate’ sex offenders, it is well known to kill off sex drive and is prescribed in many states of Australia instead of Spironolactone as it attacks the liver rather than raise the risk of heart attack with a Spironolactone prescription. Spironolactone is used to control (reduce) blood pressure and causes potassium retention. To much potassium in the body results in heart arrhythmia and possible heart failure.
Shells
-
Hi Christine, I can’t generalise as I know that the sexual responses of trans women pre and post op are known to be widely variable. I can only presume the existance of a female sexuality from my own experience. I know others who simply last all sexual urge and never regained it.
Shells, I was on androcur and while my response dropped almost completely it came back later.
As to why and what mechanism was involved I can’t tell you. I can tell you it was no longer centred in my penis, and no not there either lol. It was centred just below the scrotum. When it happened I was quite shocked (in a nice way but still shocked) and couldn’t get any information at all which is why I am going into such detail….so if it ever happens to someone on this site they will know it is normal and is a good indication of a healthy sexual response post op. I have subsequently met some girls reporting the same thing.
I did feel like the hormone regime I was on actually rewired both my body and my mind….not instantly….but over time definitely.
It’s a very interesting topic but as we all have different paths, different hormones and different experiences I doubt we will ever have the same shared feelings as to what female sexuality may be about.
Just in case it works for you though I would encourage any girl who has been on hormones for a while to experiment with the less obvious parts of their body…..you may be surprised! A nice bath some candles and some incense might help with the mind bit
-
Quote:It was centred just below the scrotum.
I had this before going on HRT, and still enjoy it.
Shells
-
Gwen, I wonder if the SRS and the moving things about puts the sensitivity in different spots? Just a thought. I am glad that the ‘OP” does not mean a loss of libido for those who value it in their lives.
