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Getting involved
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I have been a member for about seven years and like Julie Marie am a hapily maried CD whose wife is suportive and I am comfortable with my Gender choices. Whilst I seldom ,lf ever, post to the forum it is only because usually somebody has already replied in much the same way as I might and I belive that if you have nothing sensible to say then say nothing. Also ,like Julie,I have no particular interest in a lot of the posts as they are about transition and after all these years they tend to be about the same subjects.
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I love to get involved , but i find often the time i spend on line on the 10 or so sites i visit leaves little time to spare, i love to read the out put of others and do find if, as i tried once to coment on all i veiw on line , i am left no time for communication of a personal nature.
Now as an occasional, I am not sure i have a lot of value to add to some of the discusions so i defer to others rather than waste everyones time with my pointless comments. I think it would be true that a lot of people are going to use this site as a referance point to judge their own progress and to improve themselves in ways that suit them.
I do not feel anyone should feel obliged to participate any further than they are comfortable with, and there are some that are voyers but i guess if we want to hide from them that would mean hiding from the world.
Now that i believe is some what of a backward step cause as an all but unseen community hide and the world will suspect the worst. Some will probably see this as negative comentary but be assured it is only imput that is an attempt to explain some of the apparent lack of activity that is some times seen.
Personally i will post when ever i feel i might be constructive or when i have time to follow all the links, if anything should require my support i am happy to give it as i do to all our community with whom i communicate.[/color][/i]
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I’m a rare poster on TR at any stage, but that is due to a number of reasons.
First of all, I have limited time, and what time I do have, I tend to jump around a lot on various forums. It’s like shopping for me, I will see something I’m interested in, I will go to that thread, read, post if I feel the need, and then get out of it and go do something else. There is another site which I spend a lot more time on (fetlife) but I do that because I’m a member of a few local groups, I know many of those people personally, and they are quite specific to me. There are also a large number of other groups on that site, which I don’t pay nearly as much attention to. That’s just the way it is for me.
Secondly, I don’t feel that I truly identify with the majority of the members on this site. I do notice that there are a few members, like myself, who are happy being as they are, dressing part time, and living their lives in male mode for the majority of the time – I fit that situation. I don’t have anything against those who want to make the transition etc, thats great, and fine for them, but I just don’t feel it’s my thing. So I rarely post to anything there.
Thirdly, there appears to be some incredible hostility to and from various people on the site, including the administrator. Now, I don’t know the full history of any of it, and I haven’t spent enough time posting to encounter any of the frustrations that others might. But from an (almost) outsider’s point of view, it’s very offputting to find yourself in the middle of an argument. So I try to avoid that sort of stuff, and just get on with the things I find interesting. I can say, however, that this site is so full of information that it’d take me way too much time to go through everything, find interesting stuff and read it all. It’d almost be a full time job. So for one person to manage the entire site, have to read everything etc and come up with new stuff to put up, I would imagine, is an incredible task. Certainly not one I’d be going into lightly. Even if there are several people doing it, I can see a mammoth task ahead.
Finally, I want to say that I do get the daily updates of posts, and I do read them every day. So I’m not completely cut off from what’s been said. I just don’t see the need for me to post a lot. Like I said, thats just me.
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I’m an off and on viewer, but really don’t feel I have that much to say – more act like a sponge and take in information about what other girls are going through.
I’m still early in anything to do with transition, so don’t feel my experiences add anything to the posts that I tend to read.
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Well, it seems that my post has prompted 35 to reply and most of those were infrequent posters so I call that a success! Good on you for doing so and I hope that you can continue to do so and give us your opinions on lots of issues.
None of us a experts on these issues , we all have our own experiences and perspectives so your views are as important as anyone elses.
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Hi All
I am new to TR but I would like to comment on the difficulty of communicating via email which is essentially the same as these forums. I have been in a very isolated situation for about 21/2 years and the only way of maintaining contact with the outside world was via email.Is there a worse way of trying to express emotion or trying to convey ideas? When we talk to each other we rely on facial expressions, intonation and many other visual cues. These are all lacking in emails.
Secondly there are so many words that have different meanings when read a different way.
We are such a widespread disparate community. The only way that we can effectively keep in contact is via emails like this (read forum).
Therefore I beseech us all to a; keep talking to each other to clear up misunderstandings b; before you hit the send button of a critical email to sleep on it. Review what you have written in the morning & then if that is what you want to say hit the send button.
I get so much out of these forums (the plural is fora) that I would hate to see them fold – even if I do only just read the entries.
Stay classy everyone.
Hugs Lisa
