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More about my recent experience
Travelling by Air and Presenting as Female
Wow, what an amazing experience. Yes, it is very much possible to do this. I don’t perceive to be anything other than a man that likes to present as female. I know that I don’t pass. That’s right, no rose-coloured glasses here. But, to do this successfully, it has to be done with confidence. I can honestly say, I was extremely nervous and had visions of being refused entrance at the check-in counter and then refused entry through security. But all those fears were completely unfounded. The fears and imaginations in our heads are what we have to learn to overcome and get on with life. I was going to travel by plane from Cairns to Melbourne.
My day started pretty much with the resolve that I was going to travel as Jessica. I had contemplated this for some time and through circumstances, everything had fallen into place to make this the ideal trip for Jessica to have her first foray into the world of airline travel. I went to breakfast and looking for some support, asked the receptionist at the hotel if I should travel as I presented. Without a single hesitation, she said – Go for it. Well, that was all I needed. The only thing I toned down in my appearance was to wear a pair of slacks and a short wig. In hind sight, I should have worn my longer wig, but now I know and that will just have to be for another trip.
I had spoken about doing this with Jane at one stage and she had mentioned that she had travelled presenting female and so I took her advice and did exactly that.
I checked out of the hotel and once again the receptionist gave me the encouragement I needed. It was such a wonderful experience walking out to the car in broad daylight and the first person I encountered was another lady, who said, “It’s a good thing to see someone else in a cardigan”. Yes, while it was warm, I knew I was going to need something to combat the air-conditioning of the airports and plane. So, after hoisting all my luggage into the rental, it was off to the airport via the service station to fill up before handing in the car. First encounter at the service station went great – No, no Fly Buys or discount voucher and no I don’t want any chocolate. Off to the airport and the lady who took my keys, just smiled and said have a nice day. Wow, this was going better than I had imagined. After getting a trolley to lug all my bags to the check-in counter, I was going to find out how awesome the check-in staff were going to be. I rocked up to the check-in counter and handed over my male id to the lovely lady behind the counter, who ever so pleasantly just asked how many bags I was checking in. I must add that I am a frequent flyer and as such have priority check-in. I mentioned to the lady behind the counter how nervous I was as this was a first time for me. The funny thing is she looked at me with a puzzled look on her face and it was because of my status on airline profile, which states that I’m a very frequent flyer with Virgin. So, I had to explain that it was my first-time flying presenting as female. We both had a bit of a giggle at this and she so kindly said that I needn’t worry at all and that I looked lovely. I can tell you, this made me feel a million dollars. Simple, kind words, can make all the difference in the world and this beautiful woman had just made me feel certain that I had made the right decision. I could tell it was going to be a great day. Once all the check-in was complete and my bags had gone down the conveyer belt, I knew there was no turning back. I grabbed my on-board bags and turned to leave, she once again said, you look lovely sweetie and do have a lovely flight. That put a big smile on my face and gave me the courage and strength to go through security. Long line, but I didn’t let that deter me and stand in line I did. Look up and look ahead and don’t let anyone make you feel anything other than what you present. I was learning so much and it was making me feel soooo good. When I got up to the screening section, I took off my heels and put them on the tray, as I wasn’t certain if they would trigger the metal detector. All good and I cruised through without any incident at all. Put my heels back on and grabbed my stuff and headed to the lounge for a cuppa before the flight. But before that, I stopped at the MAC counter to get a professional opinion on my look. Another shot of encouragement from the girl there. Wow, could this day get any better? She said everything was well coordinated and I looked amazing. You go girl. Up at the lounge, it was subdued but all the staff were great and other than a few furtive glances by some of the other travellers there was not a single bit of negativity.
Once the fight was called, I gathered up everything and headed to the gate for departure. I just told myself constantly, to just be confident and hold my head up and smile. I did just that and once again, I breezed through without anyone saying anything. The lady at the gate who scanned my boarding pass was the same lady who checked me in and just smiled and wished me a nice flight. I even think there was a bit of wink in the greeting as well. I was feeling on top of the world.
The next unknown was on board and who was I going to be seated next to. I always travel in an aisle seat so I don’t get blocked in and this time was no different. My seat mates for the flight where a couple about my age and the woman took the middle seat and whether she knew or not didn’t matter, because she buried her head either in her phone or in the puzzle book the whole flight to Melbourne. I on the other hand just put my earplugs in and immersed myself in the in-flight entertainment. When the flight attendant came around to find out if everything was okay and if I needed anything, I mentioned to her that this was my first time and she just bent down gave me a reassuring smile and said I was doing great and that I looked great. Why do we always need to be assured that we look okay. Oh, I know, because we don’t look at ourselves correctly. She was wonderful and made my experience on the plane even more enjoyable. Throughout the whole flight, she kept giving me encouragement and support and even stayed and chatted for a time to get to know more about me. She was indeed a very special lady and I hope to run into her again someday on one of my many flights.
Touching down in Melbourne was a bit of an anticlimax as I knew my adventure was about to end. I still had another leg of my trip to finish, but unfortunately, I was going to have to finish the day in DRAB. I headed to the nearest disabled toilet to change and take off my makeup and wig. Female in Male out. I then went to the lounge to wait for my next flight to take me home. But before I did I went up to the staff at the service counter and asked for a way to send Virgin a compliment on their lovely service. I showed them how I had travelled and how it had made my day the most enjoyable in my life to date and they could tell how passionate I was about the whole experience. Anyway, I was able to send them a nice note thanking them and the staff, just to let them know how much this experience made me feel.
I would just like to add that this has given me a whole new perspective on my life and know that while I can’t live my life full-time, there are always moments when I can make the most of circumstances I’m afforded and step out of the boat. We live in such a fast-paced world and if we let it dictate to us how we should live then, life will just pass us by and we will live with the “What if” question always lingering in our heads. I know everyone’s situation is different and we aren’t all the same, but I can honestly say this has given me the strength to experience more of this world through my female eyes and I plan on presenting more in Jessica mode in the future.
Wishing you all the best and hope this is of help to someone.
Hugs,
Jessica
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