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The story of two transgender children (BBC NEWS)
The story of two transgender children
By Victoria Derbyshire PresenterOnline: http://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-32037397
Quote:The number of children aged 10 and under who have been referred to NHS support services to help deal with transgender feelings has more than quadrupled in the last six years, the Victoria Derbyshire programme has learned. Here is the story of two of the youngest transgender children in the UK – with permission from their parents and with the support of the children’s schools.Lily and Jessica, not their real names, bound into the room full of energy, giggling and chattering away as they carry bags full of toys.
The two friends, six and eight, are clearly delighted to be in each other’s company as they empty their stuff on to the floor – dozens of Hello Kitty cuddly toys and Monster High mannequins. Both girls are keen to reveal the names of the dolls (Zoo-Keeper Kitty, Disco Kitty) and which of the toys they admire the most.
So far, so ordinary. A scene replicated up and down the country every time two girls get together for a play date.
Except both these girls were born boys. Within a couple of years, as soon as they could talk in fact, they were preoccupied with anything normally associated with girls – dresses, jewellery, dolls and girls’ names.
Watching these young girls play, there was absolutely nothing to suggest they had been born boys. Lily was dressed in a black T-shirt, a black skirt adorned with pink embroidered flowers and black tights. Jessica was wearing jeans, boots and a pink top.
One had their hair cut in a bob, the other’s was shoulder length. They were girls to look at, in the way they dressed, played, and the things they talked about. “Jessica” and “Lily” were the names they had chosen for themselves that day, to protect their identity.
“When did I decide I was definitely a girl? Well my whole life really,” Lily says matter-of-factly.
According to their parents, from an early age Lily and Jessica were very aware of gender. They became increasingly unhappy with their gender and were drawn to dresses and toys more typically associated with girls.
And not unhappy in the way a child might be unhappy if you forced them to tidy their bedroom or eat sprouts. Lily and Jessica were becoming uncomfortable and even distressed about being boys.
“If I had to live as a boy I would be really upset,” Lily says. “Really upset. But now I’m sort of living as a girl I feel much better.” It’s a medical condition known as gender dysphoria or gender variance.
Before I went to meet them, I confess I was sceptical that children of such a young age could apparently be clear that they had been born in the wrong body.
How could anyone so young be so sure they identified as the opposite sex, wanted to wear girls’ clothes, play with dolls and hang out with the other girls in their class? Surely like my own primary school-aged children (both boys) their preferences, likes and dislikes, changed week by week?
But these children seemed adamant. Their parents told me they too had thought it might be a phase, that they’d grow out of it – but if it is a phase, it’s one that’s lasted several years.
Jessica, whose favourite subjects at school are maths, reading, art and history, explains that when she was a boy, it was “really frustrating for me. It felt like I didn’t fit in”.
There was a time when she wasn’t able to go to the loo at school at all because the boys “thought she was a girl” and didn’t want her to use their toilets, and she wasn’t allowed to use the girls’ loos. Jessica got to the stage where she wasn’t drinking any water at school so she could hold out until she got home.
Once a dinner lady thanked her for picking up some cutlery from the floor by saying “good boy”, to which Jessica reacted badly and began shouting and screaming. It took five teachers to bring things under control.
A full, interactive experience of the story, with clips of the interviews with the girls and their parents plus support information, can be found here.
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