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Does your mother know?
I’ve been trying to work out an excuse to get back to Adelaide for Steppin Out. Problem is all my family live there so sneaking in un-announced isn’t an option. So I thought maybe I should come out to one of my sisters who I think would actually be pretty cool about it. She’d probably want to come too. But this led me to thinking, what would Mum think? She’s 88 this year but she rang me the night before her 83rd birthday to tell me a very naughty joke. I’m hopeful she’d say something like,” Oh yes, I was always catching him dressing up when he was a boy” and think nothing of it.
Does your mother know? What did she say?
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35 Replies
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I was forced out last November and told my son and sister about the marriage breakdown and then the reason why. I received complete support from them. My mother (73) asked me about the breakup and I evaded the issue quite well until she worked on my sister who came clean. I then had to tell her myself. I expected the worse, and was completely honest. I was shocked at her attitude, complete acceptance, then when I went over the Adelaide and saw her she said nice legs (shaved in shorts). I was floored by her attitude, we talked and she really wasn’t that concerned about the cross dressing. In fact she mentioned a name and I said I have spoken with that person, which gave credibility to my needs.
You never know what the reaction will be, but the truth is normally the best option, all the very best.
Helen
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I think we forget that women of a ‘certain age’ (above read 73 or the great milestone of 88 ) haven’t always been that age and were young once also.
In Felicity’s case, your lovely old mum has seen the advent of everything amazing (and shocking) in modern life eg: commercial airline travel, the popularity and accessibility of the motor car, world wars, the hippie/mods/skinhead/emo movements, gays and lesbians living openly, moon landings, Hungry Jack’s dropping the Yumbo from its menu, Bert Newton getting the sack from Family Feud etc etc
I’m thinking a healthy and happy crossdresser in the family would be a welcome thing. We don’t give the old dears enough credit for being savvy about life and its rich tapestry…..a mother’s love is unconditional in most cases and her likely reaction to your news will be “I’ll put the kettle on” as opposed to anything else. Apart from my SO, the women in my life do not know about Emma and this thread has made me think that maybe they should? I have 4 older sisters (hmmm I wonder how I became a tranny? lol) whom I adore and a very very free-thinking 75yo mum. I think it is time to cleanse my conciense so my advice Felicity is to do it – and we’ll see you in October at Steppin Out with some of your mums loaned jewellry on
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Hi all,yes my mother knows as i have been living with her since my ex and I seperated and divorced,and although she does’nt call me by my female name,she has been very supportive of me,and has met a number of my T.G. friends,that she adores and has made welcome in her home,having had them over for meals etc,so all in all I consider that I’m lucky in that respect,though as emma stated,with them being around longer than us,(you thought I was going to say older,didn’t you!)they have probably seen a lot more than we realise,so it would’nt come as a shock to any of them anyway,regards,cate
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My parents and my mother in law know I am a cross-dresser. None of them really say much about it, although my mother has seen pictures of me as Rachel. They know that sometimes when they are asked if they can look after the children it’s because Mrs Rachel and I are going to a tranny do.
I guess you could say that they are accepting, even if it’s a subject that’s not really broached. We do mention it from time to time, because it’s part of our life and just let them take it as they will.
There was no rejection; that’s all that matters.
My siblings have been out with me socially, so they are fine with Rachel.
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I rang my mum to tell, when it was one of the reasons my marriage broke down, only a few months ago, I was a bit nervous, and just splurted out what i do, and a side to me i have. Her reaction was very good. I told her “eh mum, i have quite a femine side to me, and i eh, ….well…..eh….i crossdress mum, and have since i was very young, thank you so much for the lend of the clothes, i hope i put them back ok”
Well something like that, she said in was obvious i had a fem side, and it wasn’t really a surprise (and i thought i hid it so well), she said she never knew about me wearing her clothes ( i explained how meticulous i was at putting them back exactly, and scrubbed make up off). So she was really cool, she’s 54 so not as old as some others here, i think in the end, mums love ya, no matter what. My brother also knows, that was a little harder, perhaps the fact he’s a champion bodybuilder is to blame, but overall excepting. My dad, i just cant tell yet (him and mum are seperated) but i will one day when i feel he is mature and broadminded enough to understand, and accept me.
Any way thats my little story……
Jana
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Ive come out and told all my family but the funny part was unlike all here it was my mum that was the sticky one, she has not excepted my change or want me to change permantly, she wants her son, the last conversation we had was about her loosing her boy. i dont know how to handle that except that ive got to live my life and hope that one day she will except me as i am not how she wishes me to be! in the mean time it is very hard as she will not allow me to be Amy in her presence. My father was the real shock, thought he would disown me forever but he is very helpful and loving, and accepting of my needs to be female . hope all goes well for all concerned, kisses amy
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Does my mother know? Yes she does. She told me that at Xmas [2008] we would be having a talk, didn’t happen on her part. She said not to tell my Uncle [her brother] and her Aunty [my Great Aunty] as she was going to tell them. I came out in Oct.08 and she still hasn’t. She has now accepted that I am going to tell them but I have to wait for the right time, she’ll let me know. I think that this is the “conservative” side of my family!!! It doesn’t worry me, the worst that can happen is that I’m out of the will!!!
Peta A.
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I told my mother in october as well, she was great with it all and now she buys most of my make up and takes me out shopping (in male mode). It is still early days but going better than I ever expected.
I know I need to tell my father as he is going to work it out sooner than later. Shaved arms and long nails are a bit of a give away!!! It is reassuring to read some positive stories regarding fathers here. It’s seems like they have more right to say no yet I’ve read more stories of them being accepting woohoo! *hugs*. -
My mother knows about my female side and it doesn’t worry her that I know of. I told her and some other family members as well as close friends after a long term relationship ended and I was worried what may happen.
It all turned out well and it was a load of my mind, the ex didn’t tell and no one really cared. I got some wigs styled by a mates wife and some makeup as payment for helping some of the real girls with there makeup but I still spend most of my time with the guys, I have fun either way! -
I have never told my mother, but I think she suspects. As a teenager I was sprung a few times. Yeah, that was 25 years ago, but I don’t think she would ever forget.
No, I am not going to tell her……my wife knows, I think I’ll leave it at that, for the time being anyway.
Cheers
Tash
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Well I finally came out to my sister last night, and yes we’re going to Steppin Out. It did stop her in her tracks a bit but her biggest problem seemed to be what to wear. See you there!!
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I HAD AN ARGUMENT WITH AN OLD GIRLFRIEND OVER MY CROSSDRESSING AND ONE OF HER COMMENT WAS ” I BET YOUR MOTHER DOES,NT EVEN KNOW YOU DO THIS ” I PROMPTLY GOT ON THE PHONE AND TOLD HER, SHE SEEMED OK WITH IT BUT DID,NT WANT MY DAD TO KNOW AND TO THIS DAY HE STILL DOES,NT ALTHOUGH HE NEARLY CAUGHT ME IN MY NIGHTIE WHEN HE CAME ROUND THE OTHER DAY. MUM KNEW I HAD TRIED ON HER CLOTHES WHEN I WAS YOUNGER AS SHE TOLD ME TO STOP, I KIND OF THINK NOW THAT IF THEY HAD SPOKEN TO ME MORE ABOUT THE HIDDEN CROSSDRESSING WHEN I WAS YOUNGER MY FUTURE MAY HAVE BEEN DIFFERENT.
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A simple Yes
I hasve written a better response later in the posts… Sally
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Like others ive sent a few subtle hints to mum. Long hair, waxed legs, waxed eyebrows, earings.
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Allana you are a great girl and I would not think of you as anything different. Your mum must know by now, just like mine was did not want to admit it. When you get comments like you would make a great girl as a joke, then you know they know. lol
hugs
Kelly Jones
