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The one and only thread – how do you identify yourself?
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Interesting and diverse discussion
The Gender Centre has recently published an article: Seven Sexes, Then What Am I?
http://www.gendercentre.org.au/79article8.htmVirginia: those who dress in specific clothing for sexual arousal are fetishists. Also, there may be some place here for Ray Blanchard’s ‘autogynaephilia’.
Amy: in the 1980s it was believed that 50% of ‘transsexuals’ suicided. Sadly our society was not as understanding or tolerant of gender dysphoria, or even ‘cross-dressing’.
Published figures are scarce and unreliable. In 2005, the Gender Centre (Polare 70) was suggesting a suicide rate of 30% for ‘young’ transsexuals.The important point is that we are here to support each other (which is in reality what places like TR facilitates), especially the young girls struggling with doubts and institutionalised abuses and predation
As I have previously stated, this is about living our lives.
Arohanui & Blessings
Christina -
I guess this topic demonstrates the power of words. I generally use the term cross dresser to describe myself but happily put my hand up to transvestite or trannie and equally as happily confess to having a fetish for soft and lacy lovelies (under or outer wear – it matters not). I once got into trouble for using the term ‘drag’ which I personally find an innocuous, even friendly term. Its use, however, in a discussion, upset more than one person. But then, I don’t particularly like the term transgender which to me implies a change in gender in which I have no interest. Funny really, ‘cos all of the terms mentioned are not particularly threatening in any way.
Terri
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As I mentioned earlier in this post, I said I was a crossdresser but Terri, you are correct I “happily put my hand up to transvestite or trannie” also.
Not sure what the technical difference is between the three terms but they all seem to apply to me as I understand them. As noted by Terri “I don’t particularly like the term transgender which to me implies a change in gender in which I have no interest.”
Don’t know if it’s that important as the main point is we all understand each other and I think the term Trannie covers most most of us here in this forum.
Cheers,
Fay
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Hi Terri, this I find interesting, you are correct in suggesting that it is a friendly term, but it does seem to upset some.
Perhaps ‘Drag’ has become so ‘outrageous’ as opposed to the drag I used to watch where they wore simpler costumes???
HelenQuote:I once got into trouble for using the term ‘drag’ which I personally find an innocuous, even friendly term.
Terri -
Hi,
This is my first contribution to the TgR forum. Gotta start somewhere!
Being someone who has a feminine side but no plans for SRS, I prefer to describe myself as transgender or a crossdresser rather than a transvestite.
The term “crossdresser,” as Helen said at the start of the thread, is simple and to the point, and that’s what I like about it. I use the term to describe myself, and people get the idea right away. Sure, it has negative connotations with some people, but so does the term “Queenslander” in much of New South Wales.
I have to admit I avoid the term “transvestite” to some extent because it’s built up more negative connotations than “crossdresser,” no thanks to talk shows. The main reason I avoid it though, is that it sounds over-scientific. I prefer to refer to my knee as a knee, not an articulatio genus.
The term “transgender” includes me in the broad group of people whose fundamental identities have led them to cross, to one extent or another, into the gender role opposite the one that hospitals and families assigned them to at birth — and I think that’s appropriate. You might disagree with me on this, but I think of the transgender population as a community, and not just a collection of individuals; I have no less in common with post-ops, full-time non-ops, and other part-time crossdressers than I have with say, my ethnic group or other people in my line of work.
“Transsexual” doesn’t sound any better or worse to me than “heterosexual.” Neither says anything about the frequency or style of sex a person prefers.
I realise my comments might be a bit cheeky. I’ll close with a decidedly serious comment and say that I agree with Abbey Jane’s comments from Sunday: no matter which terms we use to describe ourselves, it’s only going to be unity, visibility, and dare I say courage, that people will come to respect us in the ways we respect them.
All my best,
Parker -
Quote:Quote:Hi Helen
I personally believe we are all transgendered.Disagree.
I am a man who crossdresses…plain and simple…
Miss Lina, cross-dressing is a TYPE of transgenderisim
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Quote:Quote:Quote:Hi Helen
I personally believe we are all transgendered.Disagree.
I am a man who crossdresses…plain and simple…
Miss Lina, cross-dressing is a TYPE of transgenderisim
Like I said, I disagree.
Doesn’t really bother me though…you can have your opinion, and I can have mine…
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Quote:Quote:Quote:Quote:Hi Helen
I personally believe we are all transgendered.Disagree.
I am a man who crossdresses…plain and simple…
Miss Lina, cross-dressing is a TYPE of transgenderisim
Like I said, I disagree.
Doesn’t really bother me though…you can have your opinion, and I can have mine…
Yeah – I’m still not sure about this stuff, LOL! I agree that there are two loose categories:
(note this is for M2F – I don’t know enough about F2M to comment).
A) Dudes who dress as chicks but want to remain dudes, and
Dudes who dress as chicks and want to become (or have become) chicks.Maybe 70% of us would kinda identify with A (kinda cross-dressers)?
I do think though that xdresser/transsexual is a false dichotomy and that most of us appear somewhere between the two, it’s just that 70% (if my guess is correct) are closer to A than B. We are, however, all distinct from a third group:
C) Dudes who do not dress as chicks (we’ll call them squares).
My opinion is that the only true dichotomy is between (C) and (AB). As we are discussing definitions with the (AB) group it makes sense to give (AB) a name.
It logically follows that even if A and B were mutually exclusive that they could be grouped (and thus named) together… given that they are not C.
Hmmm – following this further if (as assumed above) A and B are a dichotomy then we could also form the following groups:
CA – Dudes who do or do not dress as chicks and want to stay dude
CB – Squares and TranssexualsSo, my final point is IF crossdressers and transgender people are different then we need even more names!
Now I have utterly confused myself
Hex
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Quote:Yeah – I’m still not sure about this stuff, LOL! I agree that there are two loose categories:A) Dudes who dress as chicks but want to remain dudes, and
Dudes who dress as chicks and want to become (or have become) chicks.Hex
I’m always a bit suspicious when I’m given just two options to choose from.
In an article I wrote recently (which I’ll publish in full here one day) I proposed three stages that our transgender journey might pass through…
[ul]
Seeking to dress as a woman;
Seeking to be accepted as a woman; and
Seeking to be legally a woman.
[/ul]
The first stage, “seeking to dress as a woman”, occurs in private or may be facilitated by a support group. This is where girls learn about fashion, makeup, and the practicalities of dressing. Whilst they may go out in public they do so expecting to be ‘read’. At this stage ‘girls’ are mainly seeking self-gratification or acceptance of their cross dressing by others – maybe a partner.The second stage, “seeking to be accepted as a woman”, is of necessity a public activity. Girls seek validation of their femininity in restaurants, clubs, or perhaps the local supermarket. Looking for acceptance as a woman means that the deficiencies of their body now become a concern, and with that comes experimentation with herbal remedies, hair removal, hormones, voice training and maybe cosmetic surgery. In this stage girls are looking more for acceptance as a woman by the general public.
In the third stage, “seeking to be legally a woman”, girls no longer validate themselves against the perceptions of others, but to seek to completely reconcile their sex and legal status with their true gender.
In stage girls are seeking a legal status as a woman in society.I did a quick sample of TR members and I guess that
[ul]60% are somewhere in the first stage
33% are “seeking to be accepted as a woman” , and
7% are “seeking to be legally a woman”[/ul]
As to names for the stages – I wouldn’t go there – let alone put anyone in a box.As many know I prefer to use Transgender to cover the entire spectrum.
And I object strongly to the use of the “Trans” label because
a) it is trendy
b) no one outside the community has the foggiest idea what it is
c) it is an abuse of the English language!Flame away – but remember
a) I am the webmistress and
b) everyone when they applied told me why they consider themselves transgender! 😆 -
Quote:b) everyone when they applied told me why they consider themselves transgender!
Ha ha…I can’t even remember what I wrote…
Like I said, the term Transgender doesn’t really bother me anyway, it’s all good…
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The issue of resolving this can go on and on and on
Let us look at other credable sites and adopt definations as to what is what.
Take Wikipedia’s versions as a sugestion
Georgette
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…
Transgender/Transsexual are terms that are used by the medical and psychological sections to describe people like myself….
Quote:Transgender is someone who is physically (genetically) gendered differently from their mental (psychological) gender.The terms Transvestite and Cross Dresser are used to describe those who do not consider themselves psychologically differing in gender from their genetic gender. The former is used sometimes to describe people that get (sexual) pleasure from dressing as a member of the opposite gender.
[ul]The difference is obvious, but people often get confused by the fact that someone who has chosen not to transition and is transgendered may appear to be a Cross Dresser. Conversely someone who is taking hormones and/or be “fulltime” and appears to be transitioning may not be transgendered.
[/ul]Note, I use TG/TS instead of “transgendered” or “transexual” from here..
I know of people in TR that fit both these categories, as I’m sure many here do. We all know people that are taking hormones purchased from online sellers – I started this way, I know of many others that have done similar. I know at least one, and possibly two that have subsequently been to doctors claiming they are TG/TS and been referred to psychiatrists and have been denied hormones due to alternative diagnosis. I am not pointing fingers at who or saying it is wrong, just stating a fact that they have been diagnosed as something other than being TG/TS. These people would be more correctly labeled as Cross Dressers even though to us (and the rest of the world) they appear to be TG/TS. Motivations for such, no idea, and even if I were to, I wouldn’t go into it in a public forum.
The other issue is some of us do not like labels, some do not care what label is applied to them, and some choose their own label. For example, some TG/TS people will accept all terms CD/TG/TS/TV as labels for themselves, and some CDs will state they are TG and not TS or CD.. Each has their own definition.
Miss Lina has already stated they are a CD plain and simple, I know Miss Lina personally and I agree in my system of labels that is how I would describe them. I am not a CD (not even a full time CD)… I am TG/TS, and if I were to Cross Dress I’d be dressing in male clothes occasionally.
Regards,
Michelle
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I tend to describe myself as a Crossdresser or Transvestite, depending on the audience. I rarely use Transgender, because most people don’t understand teh term, but I do like it as an umbrella term. Also (and I know I’ll get shot down for this) I use Tranny.
Whatever term I use, I use it with pride.
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Hmmmm,
Interesting, thought provoking reading, my view is that it’s a shame that society feels the need to put everyone in little boxes we are all the same on the inside.
I am all the above, anyone of the terms are ok with me as long as they are not used/said in a derogatory manner.
Kx
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Hi, just goes to show, we feel sorry for ourselves at times, no one understands us, we get put down but, things could be worse, we could be ‘Queenslanders’ **LOL** Thanks Parker, you made my day!
HelenQuote:Hi,
The term “crossdresser,” as Helen said at the start of the thread, is simple and to the point, and that’s what I like about it. Sure, it has negative connotations with some people, but so does the term “Queenslander” in much of New South Wales.
