Carol
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I’ve been on antiandrogen for 3mths and E for 2mths and I hadn’t noticed any effect on muscle strength until this last weekend when I couldn’t pull start a small petrol motor while my son-in-law whose strength has been knocked around by being on dialysis had no trouble.
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Here is my experience for comparison. At my first visit to my counsellor at the Gender Centre I booked in as Carol was addressed as Carol by everyone there. It’s a free service so there was no need to show a card. I went to my first session dressed as a bloke but after that I dressed as Carol.
I booked in to the gender friendly GP that the counsellor recommended using my male name because that is on my medi-bank private, medi-care and mastercard cards. Ditto for the Psych he referred me to. All visits to these people have been as a bloke but that will change to Carol for future visits to the GP starting on Friday. I’ve only been to the Psych the once. I discussed my presentation with each professional each said “whatever you are comfortable with” and that it would not affect their advice to me. All have been particularly helpful in smoothing my passage. I’m not full-time carol yet and sometimes switching modes is tricky. But I’m slowly increasing my proportion of time as Carol and as a measure of helpfulness it only took one Psych and 2 GP visits to get me on hormones A-A and E.
I think the main thing the professionals want from their patient is honesty. -
Sorry I couldn’t add this to Kristyana’s topic but I’m not a moderator. I caught the second half of this inspiring interview and am determined to catch a repeat. It is Episode 21 of One Plus One and will repeat on ABC 24 today Sat 6 July at 5.30pm and then Sun 7 July at 3am & 9.30pm & Mon 8 July at 3am & 2.30pm unless bumped by “breaking news”.]
Moderator
Quote:I have moved this thread. T-Alerts are not for on going discussions… if nothing else they get deleted after 7 days! -
Reading earlier posts it is obvious everyone has their own definition of passing. I’m just a beginner at walking down a busy street or through a mall and my definition involves not drawing attention to myself and avoiding resulting unpleasantness from rude people. However resplendent in 2″ heels a red blouse and green overcoat last Friday walking down Broadway in Sydney I caught the eye of a man on his knees fixing a sign on a shop window. He did a double take looking up at me from a low angle. totally instinctively I winked at him. He rewarded me with the nicest beaming smile and I waltzed on to my hotel with a grin just as big. No I didn’t pass but it was still fun.
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Thanks Erica. I’ll be talking to my GP about this. He put me on gel because of my age. But after only one month I’m looking for something less messy and with a more consistent dose.
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Wow. Incredibly important.
I wonder what this means for the Marriage Act. Currently M+W is OK but same sex isn’t. How about M+? or W+?. Does ? get the benefit of the doubt? -
I didn’t post to impress people Ashley. I thought it might help. I actually live on the NSW South Coast and getting to the Gender Centre involves a 3-4hr train trip or 2.5 hrs by car which I do just once a month. I think it’s worth it. Of course my age helps there. A pensioner day concession is only $2.50 return!
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I can endorse the counselling provided by the Gender Centre and I’ve also seen Dr Toohey who I found to be very supportive. I’d add Dr Emanuel Vlahakis at the Taylor Square Private Clinic , 393 Bourke St Darlinghurst 02 93316151 http://www.tspc.com.au. Dr Vlahakis is a sympathetic GP specialising in gender issues. He was recommended to me by the Gender Centre and in turn referred me to Dr Toohey. He is now managing my hormone treatment.
Update:
Dr Cathy Pell also at the Taylor Square Private Clinic stood in for Dr Vlahakis in seeing me when he was away for a few months. She too was very understanding.
The Gender Centre has moved from Petersham to Annandale recently. -
I suppose until I’ve been there. I mean fully transitioned and comfortable in it. I don’t know what my attitude will be but I can guess. When I came to Australia 40 odd years ago I didn’t join an ex-Poms club. After a coronary bypass 15 yrs ago I didn’t join the Zipper club. I haven’t joined any prostate cancer support groups either. So when the problem is fixed I tend to move on with my life in the mainstream. I’m busily contributing at the moment on several TG/CD sites and will be going to events. I’m also taking information and experience from these places but I can foresee a day when I won’t want or need to. I certainly don’t judge others who have moved on. Good luck to them.
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One of my friends on another forum swears by using an epilator on her face and says it has dramatically reduced strong dark hairs and becomes easier each time you do it. I tried (after a lifetime of occasional plucking) but it was way too painful for this wimp. I’ve gone for laser and after two $70 sessions all my dark hairs have turned light grey and regrow at half the speed. So that is the route for me. My friend recently started electrolysis and says that there are just as many hairs to do as if she had never done epilating but most of them were small and almost invisible.
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I watched the show and later my wife watched it on i view, so thanks to Angela for flagging it. I thought it was a good first effort though it cried out for a second episode with more about the wider range of gender fluid people who do not have their eyes firmly set on a version of transition. I found it disturbing that the youngster who wanted to dress in her preferred gender without changing her body was essentially pushed by her mother into going all out so she would fit in more believably. In defence of the show’s initial failure to find “people” in Australia willing to come on the show, they did make it clear that the were seeking to start with young folk and parents were the ones reluctant to see their children outed on TV.
But definitely worth watching. -
My take on this is influenced by my partner’s struggle to understand me and balance her repulsion with her desire to keep me. And yes her repulsion repells me. She is trying hard to understand me and is increasingly succeeding but is on a very steep learning curve. Earlier she wanted nothing to do with the Carol side but can now accept everything I do including sharing a room with me dressed to the nines and knowing I have started hormones and laser hair removal, while simultaneously being horrified about what I might do in the future.
So my strategy is play for time by slowing down a bit and in her own time she may moderate even her hardest held positions as she already has. I’m not saying we will stay together but I haven’t given up hope yet. -
Thanks for the heads up about Head First Angela. I’ll definitely be watching.
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I’m with Pamela. I was desperately keen to come to Katoomba. I joined TGR in preparation. But family circumstances shifted and I just can’t this year. I’ll just have to make do with the forum and the first restaurant outing I can get to until next year.
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One of the things we can’t do is wind back the clock and try a different route. Thirty years ago when my wife felt she could no longer handle “Carol” and with responsibilities to a young family I chose to pretend to give up cross-dressing and went covert. Now in my mid 60s I’ve come out to my wife again and to my three adult daughters. My sons-in-law and grandchildren don’t know. I’ve admitted to myself and the medicos that I want to transition. I’ve started anti-androgens and expect to be on hrt next week. I haven’t told the family that it goes beyond dressing but they are intelligent and will work it out soon. Then I may or may not lose all family relationships. I’m tormented by the life I might have had if I’d taken the big step earlier. Counsellors and psychs have helped me work out who I am but if I’m honest I always knew. They helped in the birth but didn’t plant the seed. Now I have to deal with the results of choices a younger me made.
