[Elizabeth]

Thanks for your input Suzanne on T levels. I know you’re right on the button. My own low levels may well have already caused some cardio vascular problems etc. But then E levels would also be down, so one balances the other out. I’m not on HRT for health reasons however the appropriate levels still are important. My thread was put in Fun Stuff because I really didn’t believe it, now I do! Thanks.

Liz

[Elizabeth]

The problem with these often hypothetical questions is that they can blossom to include a host of ripple effects around the same subject. I have my strong thoughts and feelings around such questions and at first I thought, ‘shut up’ and keep quiet, say nothing as you might just say the wrong thing. I put myself in the persons heels and pondered over her dilema.
Basically, I believe it all amounts to integrity and where do you stand in your honesty. I’m cannot offer advice as I married without disclosing my transgenderism, however it all eventually came out and caused a load of heartache. Like others have said it will come out eventually, like it or not. I think that the boyfriend deserves to know, no, he has a right to know before entering into any long term relationship. Without disclosure when he eventually discovers the ladies secret, he will feel at the best betrayed by his love. The lady then deserves to left high and dry. Its tough, I know, how many of us have gone through those similar feelings to preserve the status quo.

Liz

[Elizabeth]

Can’t speak for HRT, I can’t use it because of shocking cardio vascular problems. Varicose veins? once they’re there, not much you can do. As Lesa said, ‘wear support stockings’ and to cover unsightly veins wear opaques. Not as good nor attractive as 8 denier on nice healthy legs, but still, we find alternatives.

Liz

[Elizabeth]

I agree with Erika, ‘thank God I live in this country’
I still shudder to think of the British schoolong system and my personal experiences with that system.
Transgender, what’s that? They would have decided I needed a bloody good hiding and the teachers would have joyfully joined in. The hiding would have beaten such transgender nonsensical delusions and illusions out of me.

Liz

[Elizabeth]

Well, the Canberra climate dictates what one wears in bed. Currently with most nights dropping down into the minus 5 and 6’s, for me it’s a flanelette nightie, short length, and long sleeved. Summer, anything goes, the less restictive the better. Keep warm,

Liz

[Elizabeth]

I jumped in with a knee jerk reaction, primarily due to my raging anger. You are indeed right Christina, we ought to carefully consider all sides.

In an ideal world, there would be no transgender people or gay people, there would be just people. I suppose I’m away with the tweeties in fairy land. Still we keep hoping.

Hugs
Liz

[Elizabeth]

Trial and error mostly. Try the internet there are some reasonable posts, whether they’re any good is anyone’s guess. I learned the basics there, but it’s still trial and error. I often feel that I put on too much and feel like I’m presenting as a pantomine dame.
Back to the drawing board.

Liz

[Elizabeth]

Of course my partner (wife) read Sarah’s post on the reflections of a transpartner and, as a result became very quiet for some time. I guess she was thinking and considering the reflections that were posted.
The bottom line was that she totally agreed with what had been written. It’s not easy being a transpartner, it’s bloody hard at the best of times. Irrespective of what we think, our partners are deeply affected by our constant desire to present as a facsimilie of a woman. A partner would need to be psychologically exceptionally strong; (I’m thinking more of water off a ducks back). I’m very lucky in having such a partner, many of you have met at various functions. It’s not been easy for her, its been bloody hard which makes me feel like an absolute bastard, which in the main I don’t need. Nevertheless we progress, constantly learn from each other and as a result readily accept the foibles of others and recognise our own weaknesses. I am indeed a very lucky person.

Hugs to all

Liz

[Elizabeth]

How old was I when it all started? A long, long time ago, when I was about four. Boarding school for the sons and daughters of gentlefolk, I wet the bed, a nervous reaction to being locked up in Stalag 13. I was dressed in navy blue knickers and white, lacey party dress with short sleeves. I had to wear that bloody dress for the whole day, and take the derogatory laughter and remarks from the other kids, both male and female. I’m certain it didn’t start enything, I was predisposed for girly things well before birth. The incident just helped things along a little. Funny thing is, I can remember it as though it was last week.

Liz

[Elizabeth]

Like Amanda-Adrian, I have been blessed, possibly with only a half-tank of testosterone, and only whisps of grey. If I allow the stuff to grow it becomes untidy (as constantly told by my wife). I have yet to encounter a hairdresser who is capable of cutting my hair as I would like it. As already said, they cut as they have been taught, almost a standard short back and sides, Yuk!
I’m still looking whether they are TG friendly or not, so long as they can style, so far no luck.

Liz

[Elizabeth]

Chloe questions is being Androgyne acceptable?

For a start Chloe, its not what others find acceptable in you that matters, it’s what’s acceptable to you. The only person you need to satisfy and be comfortable is yourself. So, you consider yourself ‘intergender’ and I suggest many of us would really feel the much same about ourselves. How you dress doesn’t matter at all. Its what’s projected from our inner selves that gels with others around us. It’s on that basis that we are either accepted or rejected.
I’ve said this before, if you can’t accept yourself you can’t possible expect others to accept you. Having said that, I know just how difficult it is to truly accept yourself, very difficult indeed as there always niggling doubts. There is no such thing as perfection, it’s a fallicy; we can only do our best and that means acceptance, and how we portray ourselves. Last night I was privilaged to being on the inaugral Xmas in July train trip. I was surrounded by 240 truly beautiful people, the train was full. In our little group of 15 transgender people, all were different, some tall, some short, some skinny, some ‘comfortable’, some were as male, mostly presented as women, but the thing was, they were all beautiful and totally accepted. We had a ball.
Be yourself Chloe, and I wish you all the very best,

Hugs,
Liz

[Elizabeth]

Wow! Unfavourable transgender characters featured in movies and TV stories. TV writers (no pun intended) have, perhaps had negative experiences with transgender people and find it difficult to portray them in a positive light. As for the average member of the public finding difficulty in accepting policemen, boxers or even gay characters as transgender, who’s fault is that? Let’s be honest, transgender folk are everywhere successfuly performing a wide variety of workplace roles. So, what can be done? Christine, as a writer, including myself, perhaps we ought to buckle down and start writing imaginative material which includes positive roles for transgender folk and, hopfully positive outcomes.
I’ve written material which included lesbian overtones with lesbian characters and was told in a critique that there should be more such writing. I viewed my characters as positive, genuine and caring people.
But I do know what you mean, disguised killers, disguised robbers, presented as unsavoury characters. But they’re not genuine transgender.
people. I would have considerd ‘Transamerica’ portraying someone positive, a movie I liked depsite some people giving it negative critique.
What do you think?

[Elizabeth]

When my mother was carrying me she was convinced I was a girl and was so named, Daphne. It was a huge disappointment when out popped a boy. My hastilly chosen male name, Ellis is not bad. An American name and often used by women, (I’ve met a few female Ellis’s) didn’t gel for me. Many years ago when I required a femme name for NSW Seahorse, I chose Elizabeth, a good solid name (think of the Queen). A bit of a mouthful so Liz has stuck. The initial is good for credit cards etc. I’ve been Liz for so long, Liz is now me. Daphne was a bloody awful name anyway and would have been changed by me! Then I think of Daphne Du Maurier and her wonderful novels who originated from my home county in Britain, a smart lady, so maybe, just maybe.

Liz

[Elizabeth]

I’m somewhat with Chloe on this issue. Dressing, or presenting as a woman has, for the most part consumed every living moment of my life, and that’s a lot of life! In many ways I have often considered that all the pervading needs of feminine desires to be a waste of a life. Would life have been very different if I hadn’t been blessed or cursed with those inner needs? A conundrum indeed.
I present full time as androgynous, a bit crappy to be honest. Always blouses, a woman’s trouser suit, no, I don’t own male underwear and haven’t for more than thirty years. I own a male suit, just the one for weddings and funerals, just to please ‘she who must be obeyed’ and when those moments do eventuate, I hate it. Am I just a crossdresser? or is there something deeper seated within me? I think the latter. I have no need to be male at any time, I hate being male. I really no longer think of dressing as feminine dressing is now the norm. I only think of what underwear to wear for the day and what suite to wear.

Hugs to all,
Liz

[Elizabeth]

Does one tell Mum or even Dad?
For me forget Dad, he really never existed, but as for mum, well, she never did know. Like everyone else I toyed with the idea of telling mum about my compulsion to be a woman. I procrastinated and I procrastinated out of sheer terror as to the outcome. I’m timid and mum was a terror to others, both men and women. She ran her businesses with a rod of iron and used similar tactics with family members. Mum was feared by all. 25 years ago Mum died of lung cancer after an adult life of smoking. I was tempted to tell her in her last weeks of her life, but then I thought, what’s the point? Telling her of my desires may well have induced shock to her already terminal illness, and I let it go. I have mulled my thoughts over and over and have never come to a satisfactory conclusion. I guess I did the right thing. Did she have a inclination as to my secret life? I think she did know something was afoot, but that was it.
I admire my ‘T’ friends for their strength of character in telling their family of origin members. It makes me feel even more timid that I am. As Rita Brown once quoted, ‘Some people will like you for yourself. Most will like for what you can do for them, and some won’t like you at all. To my mind that quote includes family members.