[Elizabeth]

Hi Cathy,
To me sharing (verbalising) with your partner is the greatest of all stumbling blocks on the journey towards transition. You have to be prepared for any eventuallity and outcomes with your partner. Think about it, what a shock! Despite the initial acceptance it takes time for the whole concept to sink in and digest. The outcomes may well be different from the initial reaction.
It is a case of treading gently, step by step, accepting whatever your partner feels and decides. If you’re lucky, very lucky, she’ll stay and go along with the flow, otherwise she’ll pack her bags and go. To transition requires you to relinquish something (a loss) which probably means your partner. To keep your partner means you have to forego somerthing, your tranistioning, however you may well retain your loving relationship, albeit with you occassionally crossdressing and even attending outings crossdressed. It’s a compromise.
Maybe, just maybe, your partner will research and learn about transgenderism which will aid her true acceptance or tolerance and even support you. It is something you both have to work out betwen you.
I wish you both luck.
My first relationship ended abrubtly, my second loving relationship is going strong after 40 years with acceptance, on both sides. Oh yes, we’ve had our up and downs, a great many, but we stuck at it.
Liz

[Elizabeth]

I agree with Maya, there almost always seems to be something very fishy about this story; twisted to encourage the sale of more papers.
Honesty is the best policy, nothing to come back and bite you.

[Elizabeth]

I have, with my wife been transfixed with the ABC 2 docos, My Transsexual Summer and the latter F2M episodes. All are well worth watching and so well done. Last nights segment on the 16 year old schoolboy was particularly poignant and what a supportive mother, a Saint I would say. Last weeks ‘Kitchen Cabinet’ was an interview with Senator Louise Pratt (WA). Her relationship with her partner was treated in my view with the normality it deserved. Perhaps the media has, at last turned a significant corner in the presentation on facets of transgenerism.

[Elizabeth]

Just watched the final episode and I couldn’t stop the tears from flowing. The differing attitudes of the participants nearest and dearest. I guess I was wondering how I would react if my son or daughter ‘outed thermselves’ I hope I would be overwhelmingly supportive, but then I’m me. Sarah holed up in a bedsit in Britains gay capital, Brighton, I wonder? When I recently visited Britain my daughter took me to Brighton and made the comment to her mother that I’d fit in with the Brighton crowd. They had no idea what it’s all about.
I wonder if the production company could produce a follow up series on how all the participants were progressing. It might be interesting.

[Elizabeth]

I was undecided as her reasons for her mind change at the (almost) last minute. I wouldn’t trust the media under any circumstaces and the reporting could well be a bit ‘ifffy. Certainly read as reported and no doubt true, it appears the usual bigotry and transphobia from family and all around her. A great pity indeed when she has to revert to being a boy to please everyone, family and friends alike just to make her way in life without being harassed. I hope that in the not too distant future she realises where she is on the gender spectrum, continues with her transition and tells all around her to go to hell. And why the army? to ‘make a man of her’ at someones suggestion no doubt. My question to the family would be, ‘what’s wrong with having a daughter?’

[Elizabeth]

I missed it on Friday, but it was seen by my wife who enthusiastically verbally repeated the episode to me on Saturday morning. I did see it via the internet. I believe the participants came from varying walks of life and differing points on the gender spectrum. The location of filming was gorgeous. Who could not feel for all the partricipants? I resonated and identified with the older woman (ex policeman); didn’t catch her name. I felt that beneath the smiling surface she was thinking of her soon to be surgery (who wouldn’t) and looking back on the journey already taken. And looking forward to when she would feel complete, but the journey, process continues throughout her life. I cried and wished that I was in her place. I assume we will, as viewers follow her journey to some point.
Looking forward to the continuation of the series.

[Elizabeth]

I agree with everything that has been said so far around pushing bounderies to find acceptance. Isn’t that just what we are endeavouring to do? I use some make up daily, nothing flamboyant but enough to feel good, and I wear female clothing, pants suit is order of the day with blouse and the usual nominal underwear. Push those bounderies I say!

Our German father is a hero, a trendsetter and most definately someone to be admired. We need more fathers like him.

Hugs
LIz

[Elizabeth]

I’ve tried so many different methods of concealment and to some degree they all work. Red lipstick applied over the remaining shadow after shaving works followed by, of course, a concealer, I use ‘Napolean.’ I don’t think it any better than any other. The whole process of applying make up is slow, slow, very slow.
Have a really close double wet shave, followed by a glass of your favourite wine.
Apply a few streaks of red lippy over the remains of your beard, lightly blend in with fingers, followed by a glass of wine.
Apply concealer, probably two coats and whilst drying sip a glass of your favourite wine.
Apply foundation and drink a glass of wine.
We are now ready to apply makeup, gently and evenly and another glass of wine.
Your favourite powder is next and eye shadow, lippy etc and a glass of wine.
By which time I really don’t think you would care if the beard is covered or not. I’m sure one would look much like the ‘Joker.’
By the way, all this most certainly works for me, especially a quality wine!

[Elizabeth]

My problem, despite buying shoes (size 11.5 Aus) from Rosenbergs, Melbourne and from Myers stores is width. Wider fitting shoes seem to be more difficult to find. I don’t really think wider fitting foot needs are catered for. Anyone have some ideas?

Liz

[Elizabeth]

I like to think I try follow the teachings of a Zen philosophy and indeed value the inner beauty of everyone. (The wrapping paper helps).
A very brave young woman and I truly admire her. I agree with Chloe and I guess it’s up to us to put it out there without hiding behind a ton of makeup, and as usual ‘be ourselves.’

Liz

[Elizabeth]

Did I tell you about me?
Now who’s guilty on that count? I have no doubt whatsoever about my guilt. Transgenderism seems to me to pervade my whole life. (There we go).
As someone once said to me (again) ‘there’s more to you than being transgender.’
I mean what is there to talk about except dresses, elegant shoes, makeup, dining out? Me! I get heartedly sick of hearing others droning on and on when all I want to talk about is my latest purchase from the local shoe store or a dress I just couldn’t resist. Cheer up Amanda-Adrian.

Now what was it you were saying?

Liz

[Elizabeth]

Coping in warmer weather. I found it hard to even contemplate warmer weather when the frost is laying heavily on the ground. Warmer weather, bring it on!

Liz

[Elizabeth]

The usual questions arise around educating the general public on transgenderism. The hows and the whys. Me, I just try to be myself at all times, open, honest, somewhat timid. I don’t try to compete with the clever people, but I research, avidly read, hopefully the right material, absorb and listen to those who ought to know.
I don’t rightly know what the answer is to why and how. Dr Fintan Harte, Director, Monash Gender Clinic told me the origin is inherent, although I still wonder?
The easiest way that I know is to accept yourself for what you are, difficult at the best of times, and above all, smile and talk from the heart.

Liz

[Elizabeth]

An interesting article indeed. Parents and people as a whole are struggling to understand gender in its full spectrum. And people who are struggling are, in my opinion themselves on a spectrum of understanding and acceptance. I cry for children who are trying their damn best to be themselves only to be shackled by well meaning experts in gender. The problem, as I see it is that no one for certainty knows the exact causes of gender variations. They (the experts) are trying to find the reason, but don’t really know, I wish they did know for sure.
I cannot help but equate the children’s predicament with my own experiences.
I am what I am. After a lifetime of guilt, shame, uncertainty, depression, suicidal thoughts and actions but underneath knowing just what I am (basically a woman) I just want to be me.

Liz

[Elizabeth]

I’m not too sure just how serious I’m supposed to find the article. I found both entries to be an absolute hoot. At the same time I identified with a lot of what was experienced and said.
I for one certainly appreciate just what women go through for the sake of attempted beauty. Often I feel like the Hunchback of Notre Dam endeavouring to appear as Sophia Loren, hoping I have succeeded but knowing full well I still look like the Hunchback in a frock.

Liz