[Carol]

I think this issue is at the heart of what we are about Caroline. I too was blown away by the attitude of the civic leaders who spoke at IDAHOT. In my own life my close relatives are struggling to understand but I believe they would find it so much easier if the general community was on side. I’ll keep working on the issues at home but don’t give up on Alpha Centauri, that is where victory lies.

[Carol]

I really, really hope you haven’t left it too late because I started at age 65.
In my case the Gender Centre in Sydney suggested a sympathetic GP who cut me some slack “because at your age we assume you’ve thought seriously about this for some time”. I went through a gentle discussion with a psych and all the doors opened. Give me a PM if you want to talk more. Caroline is right though, doing it with medical supervision is by far the safest way.

[Carol]

Hi Jane. About 30 years back my wife complained to her two sisters about my crossdressing. They immediately told their husbands but I loved the reaction of one of my brothers-in-law who at the time was in the RAN. He just shrugged his shoulders and said “There’s a lot of that in the navy”.

My own first time out was about the same time. I decided to go for a walk in a Canberra park. I put on a conservative denim skirt and sleeveless white top with a dodgy wig from the back of my wife’s wardrobe. I took on board a bit of Dutch courage and drove to the selected park. I had a quick walk then dashed back to the car. My mistake was to choose a park near the Governor General’s residence. As I went to drive out of the car park a police car came in. He stared at me as I went past, then followed me for a few kms as I drove carefully under the speed limit. Finally he pulled me over and asked what I had been doing. I was completely honest, terrified I’d be locked up for drink driving, would lose my security clearance etc. Perhaps to teach me a lesson I was given a serious frisk search and told to go straight home.

[Carol]

Just heard that my sister-in-law, brother-in-law, nephew and nephew’s wife will be in the Blue Mountains for some running event this coming weekend. That could lead to interesting reunions.

[Carol]

Yes I worked out it was the North Face 100 straight after posting. The youngsters are serious international endurance racers. Problem is the oldies will be all over Katoomba doing the shops. My wife is in a blue funk. She seems to have forgotten she told her sister about my crossdressing 30 years ago! Que sera sera.

[Carol]

I thought Mx was a silly idea from the start. Now that I know it’s pronounced Mucks I’m beginning to think it was proposed on 1 April. It’s certainly not relevant for TGs who still have a binary model as their objective, nor for those who are part-time members of another gender. For those who reject the binary model, like Adrian, many seem to reject the whole idea of labels but I guess that’s for them to say.

[Carol]

Your “what ifs” rang a bell with me, Caty. On my first trip to the Gender Centre in Sydney I carefully explained to my wife what I was doing but her imagination ran riot. She thought I might sneak out of my hotel the night before, go for a walk down George St as Carol and get bashed and hospitalised. (At this stage she knew about Carol but hadn’t agreed to see me dressed. That came later).
I actually had a pleasant evening as Carol in the hotel room and then next morning as I drove my car out of the basement car park my mobile phone went berserk. I’d accidentally left it in the car overnight. My wife not able to get the phone to respond, assumed the worst, rang the Gender Centre and shared her panic. Then she rang our eldest (adult) daughter who tried to calm her down but in the process my daughter learned all about Carol for the first time.
I got to ring all of the above as soon as I’d read the multitude of messages just in time to forestall calls to the police and hospitals. In the wash-up I had to come out to our two other daughters. Not exactly how I’d planned the coming out to family but as they say “better out than in”.

[Carol]

After watching the SBS program “Is Your Brain Male or Female?” 27/04/15. I was left with the overwhelming impression that the title should have been “Is male or female behaviour driven by inherent features of your brain?” with the answer being “Not sure”.
One element that pricked my attention was the claim that adult male and female brains have a different pattern of connections, Male with connections from front to back dominant and Female with better connections between left and right hemispheres. This differentiation doesn’t arise though until ages 13-18.
That is the age at which I became aware of my TG nature, probably just a coincidence, others have earlier or later self recognition.

[Carol]

I wasn’t going to comment here because the starting position suggested it wasn’t for those whose nearest and dearest knew. However I’ve had a thought about my on line friends who will suddenly or slowly notice my failure to post after the interface with the proverbial bus. I can’t rely on my relatives to send out an all points bulletin that “Carol” has been bussed. If I gave my key contacts to them to be opened in the event of my being squashed they are quite likely to send an agro “It’s all your fault” message. Tricky.

[Carol]

Liz wrote:

Magical and mysterious events happen in Bangkok as we all know; just look around you.

They certainly do. I was propositioned in a hotel bar there but in my case I was the ugly male and the propositioner was a tall leggy blonde person. I didn’t have to check my moral compass though or do a risk assessment. I just told the truth that I was killing an hour waiting for the shuttle to the airport en route home. She wandered off looking for a more promising mark.

Well done you Martina.

[Carol]

Thanks Martina. I’ve watched the first 6 parts and found them fascinating. Jo Ann and some of the others looked fantastic but talk about a parade of old fashioned fashions and old fashioned attitudes. We really have come a long way.

[Carol]

I’ve tried chat rooms before but I was a miserable failure. My one and a half finger typing was so slow that I was answering a question that was two pages previous by the time I sent my thoughts. Private messages where I have time to send a considered response are much more my style of “chatting”.

[Carol]

I watched the entire SBS broadcast of the Mardi Gras Parade and there was a brief segment on TG, but if you’d blinked you’d have missed it. To be fair given the huge preponderance of LGB floats and issues I can’t blame SBS.
For me the good news in the last year or so is that virtually all activists and official statements talk about LGBTIQ. I’m not too proud to take a hand up from the letters that represent more participants.

[Carol]

I don’t know Martina but the main message I took was that this was another plain positive story with not a smidgeon of shock horror in it and that has to be good. It was also in today’s Good Weekend magazine.

[Carol]

Well as my second Transformal this year had no chance of matching the absolute high I was on at my first time last year but it came pretty close. Thanks to Adrian, Caroline and the other “permanent” staff. The IDAHOT involvement was brilliant (can someone more technical than me explain how I can download the pictures?). I’d heard that Connie couldn’t make the event this year but hadn’t realised she was in hospital. I hope she gets well soon.